There are plenty of reasons to say no. Whether it’s because you don’t want to do something, it goes against what you believe, you truly don’t have the time, you know it will take away from other opportunities you’d rather have, and occasionally because you just don’t feel like it.
I’ve gotten so much better at this and at realizing I often don’t owe an explanation for my no. Saying no has been a hard lesson for me to learn, but over the past year or so, I’ve really seen what happens when I leave time for better things to happen.
And yet, I can’t always say no, even when I want to.
Especially when it comes to my family.
Curling up in my pajamas and reading sounded like the perfect way to spend a night last week… while driving 45 minutes to sit on cold bleachers for a soccer game and then driving the 45 minutes back, making my boys get home well past their bedtime on a school night, when they’d run around during the whole game so I’d have to be sure to keep my eye on them sounded like not the perfect way to spend a night.
But my husband was coaching, it was an important game, he wanted his family there. So we went. And I did enjoy myself.
Having a family movie night at home was my idea for the most activity I wanted to do on a Friday night, but one of my boys had a birthday party to go to. So, I took him and he had a fabulous time. I didn’t have to stay, so why it was even a big deal in the first place, I don’t know.
A rare Saturday without any soccer/basketball/baseball games sounded like a great time to go check out some fun places we’ve been meaning to visit, but another birthday party was what another of my children wanted to do. And even though it required me to have to get a pass to go on one of the bases around here(something I haven’t done in almost 15 years) and had me worried because I had no idea where I was going, it’s what we did.
And of course, he had a blast and the parents of that child were very happy to see a classmate of their son’s since most of the other kids had opted out.
When my husband wanted to have a couples’ night two nights in a row, I groaned a little because two nights in a row. But really, I love the couple we were spending time with and we all had a great time and I’m glad we actually had the time to see each other so much.
It wouldn’t be fair of me to say no to all of these things, simply because I felt like it. All of these things ended up being a good thing.
And I’m well aware that my husband and my boys find themselves doing things they’d rather say no to, but they do them for me. Right now, wanderlust is hitting me hard and I know my family will go along with my idea for a getaway.
It’s what a family does: acknowledging each other’s needs and sometimes letting ourselves be pushed out of our comfort zones for the sake of someone else. And sometimes even realizing we should have immediately said yes in the first place.
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