After a really long drive last week, we spent a few days with my family in PA.
There are 8 cousins on that side of the family, ranging in age from 7 down to 6 months.
And while the standard party line is “you don’t compare kids to each other” it happens all the time in my family.
And the comparisons get ugly.
Who is smarter than who, more athletic, better looking… and this comes from the grandparents… and is why I really should have packed a case or two of wine with me on this trip.
My kids are considered the bad kids.
Because they are active.
Their cousins are all very reserved(or too small to get around much yet) and are the types who will sit on the back patio beside their parents, just being quiet, while the adults talk. If my boys were acting like that, I would be taking their temperatures because they must be sick.
Instead, my boys look around and think ooooh, a big fenced-in yard, a bounce house, balls, bikes, and even a dog to play with.
If we count this furry guy, there are actually 9 cousins on this side of the family.
And they go play.
They might sometimes be a little loud in their games, but they are outside.
And yes, they are in non-stop motion, but again: they are outside.
Yet, they get called wild and bad because they aren’t just sitting there.
When we are in situations where they have to be quiet and they have to walk instead of run or when they actually do have to sit down, they are able to do it. But, I don’t see anything wrong or bad about them playing when they are in the backyard with toys.
When we were leaving my younger brother’s house he even mentioned “Your boys are so good!”
And as long as your definition of good isn’t being completely still and silent all the time, yes, yes, they are good.
Do you have to deal with negative comparisons between your kids and their cousins or other kids?
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It would drive me crazy if my girls just sat next to us and were part of the conversation when there is a big yard to play in. Kids SHOULD run and jump and even shout once in a while, especially outside. I tell my girls all the time to let the adults have their time. Yes, we’ve dealt with family comparisons. I try not to let it get to me, but of course it does.
That’s my thought, too- we’re outside, there’s room to run and there are toys, so why not go play?
My kids are super high octane and not everyone can “take them.” I often get criticism from family members, or even at the town pool. They’re not causing trouble. They’re just being kids! But when I am around family or a group who criticizes, it often becomes hard to take. I am feeling you on this one!
That sounds like mine!
But as long as we are somewhere where it’s okay to be running or to be loud, I let them.
Kids should be kids. I don’t want them shouting in my ear at the dinner table but outside…I say let them get out the energy, the loud talking and yelling and anything else that I don’t want them to do outside. Your boys aren’t bad…they are kids. Kids that know how to have fun. That will carry them a lot farther than most kids who sit still and quiet next to their parents. Your boys can come play at my house any day and I’d knock about 2 hours off of that road trip 😉
Exactly- it’s different if we were inside the house or at a restaurant- they would need to chill and can. But when they are somewhere where it’s okay to be active? I’m okay with them being that way.
On one side of the family, the favorites are based on money. No joke. They family that can afford to pay for the grandparents to go to Boston, Niagara Falls, Florida, St.Thomas and Aruba is the family with the best kids. No contest. They family that can afford for their kids to each take piano lessons, dance lessons, swim lessons, trombone lessons, foreign language lessons, play baseball, basketball, and go to an elite private school…well those are the best kids. I never get to hear the end of it…
That would frustrate me to no end.
I am always defending my active kids. They also get in your space which is something we work on but bothers a lot of people. I feel ya
It gets tiring, doesn’t it? Ironically, there’s such a push these days for getting kids out there to exercise, yet criticism of those who are already active. Makes me crazy.
I get it. I have the “bad kids”, too. I figure, they are who they are. It’s exasperating listening to all of the comparisons, and honestly, after a decade+ of hearing it, my give a darn is busted. You are a great mom, you husband is a great dad, and you have great kids. Tons of energy, curiosity, and a zest for life is what make people great!
That’s pretty much how I feel about it. And by the last day we were there, I did snap.
It’s natural to compare, but it’s important that it be done in a non-judgmental way (which with some people and at sometimes is impossible). So far, I have the wild kids. They are extremely feisty and active. My house is often like a crazy circus! My sister is the only one with a child and her son is only 5.5-months-old. He seems laid-back and calm. I think that is how he will be, but we will see. Relative to my kids, he is calm. But we never relate being active to being bad or calm to good. It does get tricky when we are in situations in which quite and calm is preferred, because my kids aren’t good at that (Hayden is getting better, but Harper – who is only 13-months-old – is a mess.) in those situations, I feel judged and that people think my kids are naughty and that they think I am a bad parent who hasn’t raised them well. I don’t know that anyone really thinks that though. Most people understand that children sometimes have a tough time being still and quiet. But some people don’t. And I worry that those people think my kids are bad and that I am a bad mother.
Don’t let those random strangers bother you! Most aren’t judging and the ones who are most likely don’t have kids so they have no clue what it’s like!
I think it’s unrealistic to expect young kids to ALWAYS be quiet and still. We can teach them proper behavior for different situations, but we have to remember they can’t always be perfect- but that that doesn’t make them bad.
Oh, wow. I just wrote my own post and now feel kind of bad, because my kid is so those kids. 😉 And I love her for it – but when it’s just me and her, man, it’s exhausting – ya know?
Either way, I get what you’re saying. 100%. As always, thanks for sharing, Shell. And for sharing your space so we can share, too. See you soon!
The quiet ones? All kids are different- I just don’t think that “bad” should be a label applied just b/c a child wants to run around in a backyard.
Love this! We are often told that our daughter is so pleasant.. but then when she gets comfortable she can really let loose.. that’s when we hear “ooohh she’s tired,” or “looks who’s entered the terrible two’s”.
But she’s just a toddler. She’s exploring and learning.
I don’t see anything wrong or bad about being a kid.
Just a normal toddler! Nothing wrong with that exploring!
Wow, that would drive me nuts. Kids are supposed to be active! Playing outside is a good thing, it’s part of being a kid.
That’s what I think, too! I want to bang my head against a wall after spending time with my family.
This happens a lot within my husbands family, with 10 kids under 9. There is a lot going on and some are more active than others for sure, which creates a lot of issues. The truth is, that as long as your kids are respectful and appropriate when they need to be, having the active kids is fun in my opinion. My kids tend to be in the middle of the pack with their activity but I think it would break my heart if they didn’t get out and get wild in the backyard, isn’t that part of being kids? Next time take the wine, sounds like you are dealing with irrational comparisons, your kids don’t sound bad at all! 🙂
They still stay respectful(at least, most of the time- they aren’t perfect!) so I’m fine with their activity level. And they do know the difference between what is okay out in the yard and what is okay at a restaurant. I really do need to take the wine.
I get this – from first hand experience as a child who was compared to her own siblings and to my many cousins. I was the ‘rebellious’ one, so imagine what kinda stuff was said about me!
I hope your boys know their true selves and not be influenced or affected by what other say.
I think they’ll eventually resent the family members who say such things about them. Which is too bad since we only see them about 2-3 times a year as it is.
They’re boys! Young boys!
It would be different if they were mean or rude or something else. But they’re playing – your family is a bunch of fuddie duddies…
I agree! They aren’t mean or rude- just active!
My sisters are constantly comparing their children, mind you who are roughly 10+ or more years OLDER than any of mine to theirs when they were that age. I get so mad. Their kids were HELLIONS> One is a drug addict, the others are just yeah out there.. we won’t even go into it. But mine, who are polite and have manners, who don’t get it right all the time but are generally good kids never are good enough for them. I could just scream. Kids should NOT be up in adult conversations, that is why they are ADULT conversations.
She probably has one of those convenient memories where she only remembers the good, too.
She probably has one of those convenient memories where she only remembers the good, too.
Your boys kept themselves occupied and didn’t get in trouble – I’d be proud!!
I was!
I think ti sounds like they had a great time! My kids get rowdy, too, especially when they’re outside. thankfully, I grew up with rowdy siblings and my hubby — well, he had three brothers. Nothing seems loud or busy after raising four boys, LOL!
I think the problem comes from my stepdad- he wasn’t there yet when us kids were little and he only had one little girl, so he never saw what a bunch of little kids do. And my mom goes along with whatever he says.
Yeah, one little girl never makes as much commotion as more than one kid. I’m sorry your mom has selective memory when it comes to this issue.
I get this from certain family members too. But they’re boys. There is nothing wrong with what they do.
No, there isn’t. And I don’t allow them to be rude or mean or violent…. but active, absolutely!
Your three guys are NORMAL! Kids are supposed to play and romp around outside!
My kids are loud AND busy. I tune it out, after 16 years of parenting I’m pretty immune to it. But they play, and create and imagine and isn’t that what childhood is all about?
Exactly! 🙂
That would drive me insane!! I really feel for you, it must be hard to keep yourself calm in that type of situation! Honestly, there’s times for behaving and times for letting loose, and kids who are higher energy and kids who are introspective, none of that makes a kid bad or good! Jeez!
By the end of the visit, I wasn’t calm about it any more.
I have one of each and one who switches between being super active and more laid back. When my son was younger my husband said it one point “it is so amazing that everywhere we go everyone seems to know “son’s” name.” I had to point out that the reason they know his name was because we were constantly using it for redirection. That was when I became more aware of the fact that sometimes it is okay for him to just be a kid when we are out and not be a mini-adult.
It sounds like maybe your family is getting used to how active your kids are and maybe are starting to see the “good” in that!
Only my younger brother, really. The rest just see them as bad.
Unfortunately, the grandparents will be the ultimate losers through these exchanges. If your kids don’t feel loved and accepted for who they are, they will never make that amazingly wonderful, inter-generational connection with their grandparents.
Kids were made to play outside and—to paraphrase scripture here—to make loud and joyful noise onto the Lord. Of course, as parents, we guide and teach about indoor and outdoor voices, appropriate behavior for different situations etc. But kids are kids. They play, they learn, and they grow up. The good news is that they have you and your hubbie to guide, support and encourage them. My prayers go out to you and your family.
And we do talk to them about what is appropriate in different situations, for sure. And they do pretty well with it(not perfect, but they are learning). We only see that side of the family maybe 2 times a year and they are going to really miss out if the judgment continues.
Fortunately, no… well maybe my kids are usually the “good” kids when the comparisons are made, so I don’t notice, but then again, maybe people cut mine some slack because they are they poor dadless kids! 🙂
Even the positive comparisons get to me. Like when they talk about how much better my youngest is physically compared to the cousin that is really close in age to him and I’m like um, yeah, that cousin has an actual disability that causes him to not be able to do what my son does. Ugh.
My son has never been the type to quietly sit still. He is in constant motion but never doing anything wrong, he’s just not the type to sit still. He loves to explore and play and there is nothing bad about that.
I agree!
I have missed your blog while i was MIA.!
I am having a problem because teachers, grandparents, friends, everyone compares Evil to her reserved, quitet, calm older brother. No one is good compared to him. I am constantly defending her while trying to give props to my son. It’s exhausting but thankfully Evil is not lacking in self confidence.
I do see a bitof irony in this comment and my blog name. LOL
Those comparisons seriously suck.
LOL @ the irony!
Welcome back!
My MIL always says my kiddo is the best of her grandkids and tells of all the bad things her others do/say/are. But she talks negatively to everyone when they aren’t around while she shoots sunshine in their faces, so I can only imagine what she must say to others. Negative, I’m sure. And I don’t visit without at least a bottle of wine.
Active kids are good kids.
My mom is like that about everyone, too. Nothing but good to say to your face but thinks a good way to bond is to trash everyone else to you. And we all know that she does it to everyone.
Last week my kids were being exceptionally loud in side the house so I said, “time to go outside and yell as much as you want. Just don’t do it in here.” So they did – they literally ran up and down the yard bellowing for an hour. And that’s totally OK – because they’re KIDS and outside is for YELLING AND BEING ACTIVE.
Sheesh – doesn’t everyone know that you send them outside to burn it off so that they’re moderately capable of being able to sit still when they’re supposed to?
i’m glad you and I do, at least. 😉
That’s what I think, too! They should be allowed to run around and be loud outside!
I think it is good for children to get out and play. We do it all the time at my house and when we visit others too.
I think that’s what kids should be doing.
My kids and your kids should totally hang out 🙂
Yes, they should! 🙂
I have one of each (a sitter and a super active one.) Abbey will go play, but she is shy, so in group situations it takes her a long, long time to feel comfortable enough to be active. I love when kids go play like that at family functions; I like it shows they’re happy and enjoying themselves!
Nothing really wrong with either!
Your boys are so darn cute! I’d much rather see kids running and being “wild” than sitting and doing nothing. Those little cousins will be growing up and getting wild and crazy too. There are definitely comparisons between my siblings and how we raise our kids. We are all so different. I think it’s just a natural part of being in a family.
PS
That dog is super cool!
One of my sibs thinks kids should always be quiet. While her daughter isn’t running around, she sasses so much. And I think she’ll eventually rebel like crazy. LOL
I really hate the way that “active” boys are perceived as problem children. They are just doing what they are supposed to do–acting like kids.
I’m with you. If my son were sitting quietly, I’d take his temperature too.
That is usually how we can tell ours are sick!
Boys just love to play! That’s not a bad thing. My boys will be the only grandkids for awhile so right now my parents/inlaws/siblings don’t have anyone to compare them to…maybe that is a good thing!
It probably is! 🙂
I defend my active kids all the time, for at their age that is how they express themselves. But if they end up offending someone I will always find a way to work it out.
Sometimes we just have to let kids be kids. They need to be active and run around and be rambunctious. It is party of childhood!
Ugh! I hate the comparisons and try to control my family (and myself) making them. It doesn’t work! My kids are LOUD and full of emotions and what I like to call spunk! Not traits celebrated in my family. I want to celebrate my kids (and me!) for exactly who we are today. Thanks for the great reminder!
It probably is! LOL
Oh wow so this is what I have to look forward too I suppose. My daughter and her cousins are all too young for comparison yet but I’m sure this will happen in my family in the same way it happens in yours. And I completely agree with you. Kids should run and play and be active and not sit quietly with the adults. Some of my favorite memories of my cousins when I was little happened when we were off playing on our own.
My boys have the most fun with their cousins on those rare moments when they join in with the fun play!
My kids don’t get compared in either of our families because they are the oldest. Our siblings have little babies. But they used to get compared within a circle of former friends. It’s why we stopped associating with people we considered to be good friends. The kids always got compared and judged and I hated it. I was uncomfortable everytime we got together. Sounds like your kids are normal and healthy and happy kids that enjoy playing. My kids would never just sit quietly while there was a backyard with toys and fun things to explore. That’s part of being a kid! The best part, IMO!
Oh, that would make me crazy. I would have avoided them, too.
We have similar comparisons with 12 kids 6 and under between my cousins and I. Heck we had a baby boom 5 years ago with my sister, 2 of my cousins , me, and my brother’s girlfriend all expecting around the same time! I ignore the comments and remind myself that we know our kids better than others do.
So true. I know what mine are really like and that’s what I should focus on!
My kids are the loud kids too. I always notice it in restaurants. Some families sit there all quiet — gently joking with each other. When the cousins get together around here, I send them for the door — outside. That way things don’t get broken. That dog was amazing.
Mine can generally be quiet in restaurants- not super-fancy where everyone whispers restaurants, but family-friendly restaurants. We just skip the fancy- that’s better for a date night, anyway!
I do adore that dog!
Its the same comparison on both sides of our families. I don’t understand why being active is considered bad. They are outside entertaining themselves, not causing trouble just playing. I don’t think its bad!
I don’t either- kids are supposed to play!
Oh my gosh, then my kids belong in a dang zoo! Particularly my son. Kids are supposed to be noisy and have fun, and explore and be curious about their surroundings. They are supposed to play games while the adults talk. I love my “bad” kids and their noises. And all the silly games they play. And yeah, if my kids were hanging by me not talking I would totally take their temps too.
Mine are usually only still and quiet if they are sick or about to fall asleep!
My kids aren’t compared to their cousins because their cousins are pretty little still. However, I do have one family member that doesn’t really say anything out loud, but I can tell my daughter is preferred over my son. My son is moving and busy from the time he gets up until the time he finally crashes for the night. My daughter is active, but not like he is. Personally, I find nothing wrong with kids running around outside and sometimes getting loud. It’s what they should do.
The favoritism drives me crazy.
It’s funny, I just did a post about my extended family and while I love the closeness, it comes with some of this stuff. Forever, I had two boys and a girl in a family mostly of girls. My two boys would wrestle, use things as a ball and basically were two bulls in a china shop. I’m from a family of all girls and I think the perception was that my kids were a little wild. For the most part we have been able to keep comparisons in check but my son and my nephew are the same age and my fear is that new comparisons will be made. I think your boys are fine…adorable and full of personality.
Boys are so different, aren’t they?
{Melinda} My kids have NEVER been the sit-down-with-hands-folded kind. And I’ve definitely felt the judgment. Your boys sound very normal and FUN! As my husband says, “I’ll take rambunctious and interesting over boring anyday! 🙂
Hoping to plan ahead better and link up over here next week!
Your husband is a smart guy! 🙂
Your children sound delightful, and if they are outside, they absolutely should be running around and playing! Just out of curiosity, are the other cousins girls? A friend w/ a 4-year-old girl asked me whether it was normal for my son to keep running into walls and doors. I wanted to ask her if it was normal for her child to sit next to her on the couch like a lump and watch reality tv with her. Give me an active, happy child any time!
Some are girls and some boys. There’s definitely a difference there. I would love to see you ask that about her child being a lump! LOL
They were outside, there were toys, a dog and a bounce house? Mine would have run and played and laughed and had a good time. Isn’t that what kids are supposed to do outside? Have fun, play, be active and let off some energy????
That was my thought, too!
I think this is why I’m glad, in part, that none of my husband’s siblings have children yet. I don’t know if his parents would make comparisons, but my son is definitely a challenge. They already compare him to his baby brother, who is easy so far for the most part. I had to remind them how easy Squeaker was when he was his brother’s age.
I didn’t even go into the comparisons made about my middle son. This might have turned into the never-ending post. It’s so frustrating.
Oh, that’s just ugly… the comparisons, I mean. My daughter is the first grandchild so we don’t deal with this, but she has a cousin coming soon and my candor won’t allow that shit to happen if it does. She, too, is very active (I wrote a post earlier about a woman in a restaurant telling my then 13 mo old “You’re obnoxious, sit down and shut up.”) I truly think some people still believe the old adage “children should be seen and not heard”. And that’s too bad. This world needs a lot more laughter and uplifting spirits. I mean if the kids were destroying things, that’d be different. I’d really like to say some people are just assholes, but I don’t know your family and I won’t call them that; I think some people just push their ideals of “how it should be” and don’t use their brains. Every child is special and it sounds like your “active” children love life. That’s a great thing in my book!
OMG. To a 13 month old? That is insane!
My toddler is VERY active. Since she’s a girl, it’s tough because I guess it’s assumed that girls should sit in a corner and play dolls? Not sure. But it’s frustrating. Active kids are good kids. They are fun and creative and adventurous and…kids.
This is actually one of things that happened within our family *a lot* when I was growing up. There were 10 grandchildren and so-and-so was the “social one,” so-and-so was the “uptight one,” etc. Now that I’m an adult I look back up on it like, “Wow. That was messed up.” and can really see how the labels they put on us impacted how we came to view ourselves. Kids hear everything and absorb it like little sponges, you know? So I think it’s really great that you recognize this is happening in your own family and can work to counteract the impact of those labels. Because they’re not “bad kids.” They’re themselves. And that’s a great thing to be!
Oh my gosh, you have NO idea how many parents come to me looking for a diagnosis of Attention Disorders because they feel like their kids are “too” hyper. UGH. Pet peeve. Kids are meant to have 100x the energy we have, and they need to run, grow, and PLAY. It’s only a “problem” if it interferes with functioning (school, etc). Anyway, I’m glad your boys are active and playing:)
I agree. And I think we could all be a little ore active.
Sandy
Oh h#ll to the yes! Mine never sit still. It must be that I am giving them too much sugar. or not enough sleep. or that Kraft dinner is full of bad chemicals warping their minds and behaviour (well, that might be true)…..it can never just be that they are Enjoying Life!! That the get into the midst of it and sound their giant “YAWP!” I wondered aloud once about this quiet, still child that sat beside the door to a local playroom For An Entire Hour while his mom stepped out. An hour. didn’t move. didn’t speak. and for a moment I wished that at least one of my 3 could be so still and quiet. And then I thought…..he’s not even smiling. That can’t be right entirely either. I’ll take the noise, and the business…..and the smiles. lots of smiles.
Man that sucks! Nothing worse than people who cannot allow children to act like children. When they’re outside, kids can run and be as loud as they want in my opinion. It doesn’t happen much in my family but then again we ever see eachother. My twins are 2 1/2 and my sister has never even met them. And we see my husband’s sister once a year and they are older than my kids. They do excuse away all my son’s symptoms of CP since they can’t deal with a less than perfect grandson. But that’sanother issue for many, many hours of thearpy to deal with. But my parents did it all the time with me. I was the smart one and my sister was the pretty one. And then they wondered why I had self esteem issues later in life?
That’s tough:(….It’s nice to get that pat on the back and hard when you know people are critical.(None of my kids sit still either..they are just kids!!)
Michelle
Wow I am very worried as to what they would think of my kids then– they might make your boys look good. On my side we all live so far apart and our kids are different ages that there isn’t too much comparison. And luckily on Eric’s side his parents are really good about seeing the good in every grandkid.
I don’t have to compare too much on either side of the family. My older brother’s kids are 17 and 13, so there is no comparison. And we don’t see my younger brother enough to have the “competition”. I do get complaints from my dad about my son because he is a ball of energy. That is who he is at 4. I still wonder how my dad ever survived three kids?! He says we would have never acted like that. I honestly think we did, he just wasn’t home to see it.
Sorry your boys are JUST BOYS. I am finally realizing that is how boys are. They are So different than girls. lol.
I can’t stand when people assume an active kid is a bad kid!! There have been a few times Nate has been playing at the park or dancing at storytime (it’s for kids up to 3 & they play music to encourage dancing), and someone said “ADD huh?”, makes me want to punch someone in the face. Your boys are good boys!
Oh yes! My sister compares my son to her son all the time. They are about 9 months apart in age and both should have started Kinder at the same time. I held mine out an extra year and she had her son skip Kinder altogether, so now they are 2 years apart in school even though they are less than a year apart. And the comparisons about how smart her kid is drives me NUTS!!!! I look forward to watching how the maturity level plays out as they get older because my son will be older and (hopefully) more mature in his grade, but her son is a year younger then everyone and I think it will really affect him later on. And you know what?! My kid is more athletically inclined then hers. hahahaha
I am lucky and there isn’t any comparisons made in the family. My kids are those sit quietly and cling to us ones when they aren’t on “their turf”. I wish they were a little more active (note the little part lol)
I’m new to your blog and link up–so glad I found it!
~Tiffany
Oh, absolutely! If kids are running around outside playing, that sounds like a good kid to me! I want to see kids be kids, not little adults.
Oh Shell, I got upset on your behalf while reading this. Your kids are perfect and perfectly normal! I think it’s terrible when people view healthy active full of life little boys as “bad”. I hope that they retain their sense of play and adventure always! Be proud, you are raising your children and doing a wonderful job of it!
To me it sounds like your kids are having fun and being kids! And who has ever heard of little boys just sitting there and playing quietly? I haven’t.
Ignore what they say as best you can… you’re doing a great job!
I believe we’ve had to deal with comparisons, even though it’s been silently. My boys are active too and sometimes loud and pretty dramatic and I’m sure thoughts have crossed the grandparents minds – especially my father-in-law and his second wife. He and I once got into a conversation about the behavior of my oldest and how different his behavior was from his other grandchild…it was well-meaning but hearing the comparison hurt. I wanted to scream, like there was something not normal about my son because he didn’t act like the other grandchild and her friends.
I try to remember that the impressions others get or the labels they put on my boys are not necessarily who my boys are – I know my boys the best (along with hubby) so therefore I know the truth. And that’s all that matters.
First, I would much rather have an active, spirited child than a docile one.
And secondly, it breaks my heart that your kids’ own grandparents would use the word “bad” to describe them. As the daughter of a kindergarten teacher, I’ve been trained to never tell my daughter she’s being “bad.” Not that I coddle her (nor does my mom coddle her students) but it’s just better to use phrases like, “You’re not doing your best job,” or, “You’re being naughty,” when explaining inappropriate behavior. To call a child “bad” gets into the very core of their psyche and can have long-term repercussions. I’m sorry you and your kids have to be subjected to that, Shell – and from family, too!
I really hate that word, too. It implies way too much personally. And like it’s their character and not a correctable action.
I love the idea of a house full of noisy kids. That’s what childhood is about. I remember when I was little, my grandma would always get mad at us for not sitting still. All it did was make us not like her. Kids pick up on who likes them and who doesn’t, and in the end having the love of a child is so much more important than whether or not they are running around the backyard.
I envy you you are able to let your children be who they are and to know what they need. Your ability to not want to control them is a rare gift. I am sorry there are labels placed who your kids(or any children, for that matter)but I you and doing a beautiful job in knowing what is best for your babies
Oh I can’t stand that. It makes me so angry. I would much rather see kids running around playing and having fun than being little robots.
My boys are just like yours…very active and well mine are loud too. But they are good kids, love life, love adventure and love to play. There is nothing wrong with that 🙂
oh wow…that would make me nuts! How on earth is it considered being bad to be running and playing all that energy out? Maybe, and that’s a very big maybe, they could be considered bad if they were cooped up inside all day and going crazy, but I would consider that being cooped up and going crazy…
I think everyone makes comparisons, but if you’re fam is actually verbally stating who’s better looking, I don’t know how I could take it…
But maybe that’s because I was always the chunky one…
Even when the positive comments are in my kids’ favor, it still makes me nuts. I think it’s such awful things to say.
Oh this is such an important post, Shell! All of our definitions of “good” vary so much, don’t they?
I love that you called this out, but I’m sorry that there was this “bad talk.”