This post is a part of a sponsored campaign with AVG Technologies the Mom It Forward Blogger Network.
Just when I think I’ve done a good job talking to my kids about online safety, something else comes up. Social media is complicated and when you’re dealing with kids, it’s even more complicated.
Last year, I let my then 9 year old get his own twitter account. His teacher wanted all the students to participate in a month-long #mathphotoaday challenge and if the kids didn’t have their own twitter accounts, they could use their parents’.
I wasn’t thrilled at the idea of him being on twitter, but I didn’t want him to use mine either. And I also didn’t want him to miss out on this opportunity. He was already 6 months ahead of the rest of his class in his math work and I figured this could be a fun challenge for him.
So, I set up his account(after seeing that twitter’s TOS now didn’t have a clear age restriction any more), protected his tweets, talked to him about what he could and couldn’t post, then set him up on hootsuite, with columns for #mathphotoaday, his teacher’s tweets, his mentions, and a dm in and outbox. He didn’t have his password, so he couldn’t change anything, and all notifications came to my email.
He liked doing the math challenge and when his teacher moved this summer, he used twitter to still chat all things math with him. Plus, he can dm me any time, whether he’s at school and needs something or if he’s at home and I’m not.
He didn’t use it much this fall and I basically stopped thinking about it(except for the occasional dm exchange between us).
But then one day, all these dm’s showed up in my email, from someone I didn’t know and whom I was pretty sure my son didn’t know. They were about an online game they were playing and were pretty bossy, telling my son what he should be doing in the game. I noticed them after my son was already asleep, so I figured I’d talk to him about it the next day.
The next afternoon, I asked him about it and he said that that player had asked him if he was on twitter and that was how they were messaging. I explained why this wasn’t okay and thought that was the end of it.
A few nights later, a slew of dm’s came through my inbox, asking why my son wasn’t on, telling him he had to answer “or else,” and then said something about “you have time to talk to Mr. (teacher name). Are they giving you too much homework at (school name here)”
And I freaked out. My son knew not to mention identifying details about himself online but this person had seen my son’s tweets to his former teacher and assumed that was his current teacher and school(seeing the name of the school where that teacher is now at in the teacher’s bio). Thankfully, that isn’t his teacher and that school is actually all the way across the country. But it made me realize just how much people can learn about you, even if you aren’t the one to directly post the information.
So, it was time for yet another lesson in online do’s and don’ts.
AVG Technologies and Childnet International partnered to publish an interactive e-book series, Magda and Mo, to help parents and children navigate tricky Internet safety topics such as cyberbullying and safe searching.
There’s a book for the 3+ set, another for 5+, and one for 7+. As you go through the books with your kids, there are points where your kids have to decide what they would do in those situations, which is a great way to spark conversation about the internet safety issues your kids will encounter.
Another great product is AVG PrivacyFix, which helps control and lock-in your privacy on your PC, mobile device and tablet. With a personal, easy-to-use dashboard, you’re able to monitor and adjust your privacy settings online and prevent third parties from tracking your activities and location. You can download it for free.
I am so behind on having this conversation with my kids. They are all over the web, and I am being a slacker. Bad me!
Oh my gosh, those DM’s are scary! It makes me more aware of what I need to do when my kids are older. The Hootsuite tip and no password access for the child is awesome, by the way!! It’s so scary to know your son wasn’t even giving this person info yet they were able to come across it. Kids really do have to be careful on social media.
It’s nice to know products exist to help keep children safe on the internet and that their are so many resources available.
UGH, there is so much to look out there for these days. It’s so scary!
This judt happened to one of my granddaughter’s friends. The person dm ing was getting so personal and the girl finallly told her father. This is something all parents need to check into.
My son is very internet savvy, and so far one discussion about internet safety is all we’ve needed. Fingers crossed.
What a scary circumstance. I didn’t even really consider what people can learn by seeing your feed. I am glad there are programs to keep kids safe all the time.
Yep It’s so important to talk to kids about online safety so I talk to mine quite often. It’s super scary and I will continue to talk to them often because you can’t ever be too careful!
It scares the crap out of me for my kids to be active online. It is just so easy for them to get swindled.
Oh my word, the DM’s would have freaked me out! So glad it worked out okay and your son is safe and sound!
It is nice to know that resources are available to help teach about internet safety. My son is 18 and he wants nothing to do with Facebook or Twitter. He makes fun of me for being on Facebook all the time.
Oh my gosh that is so scary! Wow, I am glad he didn’t find out any real info. You definitely have to teach kids and keep re-teaching
My daughter has been begging for Instagram, but even setting it to private makes me uneasy. She’s only 11, so it’s probably against their rules anyway. There’s just so many things to be cautious of when they are online!
It’s definitely scary out there and it’s good that you talk to your son about who he communicates with via social media!
My son is online a lot between school and home. We talk about safety quite often!
My goodness! I’m amazed that a teacher would ask 9-year=olds to get on Twitter in the first place, but I guess that is technology today. As if there wasn’t enough bullying in school, now Twitter, too?
I wasn’t thrilled about it at first. Then I thought I had it set up the safest way possible. But even with that, this happened!
I haven’t had much reason to teach them yet, because they don’t get online, but I know they will soon enough and I’ll have to have to talk with them.
That’s so scary. There are so many predators out there – I’m scared for when my kids will be on social media. Right now we monitor their online time and restrict their sites and videos. I’m going to check this out…
We had this happen with the tablet. My son was playing with strangers on a game, I think Minecraft Pocket Edition? I’m not sure now, but I do remember having a silent freak out attack and then calmly explaining to him why he couldn’t play with, or talk to strangers online, period. And we had parental controls on, we didn’t know strangers could even get through!
That happened with Minecraft with us, too. My boys thought it was okay to type chat, that that wasn’t talking. Eek!
the internet is super tricky, kids are always susceptible to dangers they don’t even know about
There are so many things to worry about! Even my son access the internet with the iPad so I have to really watch what he is doing.
I taught my kids about internet safety as soon as they started wanting to go online. We had one computer in the house and it was in the living room. now they are 19 and 21.
This is such a tricky issue to navigate. I can’t believe the teacher would ask them to get a Twitter account!
I couldn’t believe it, either. I don’t think he thought about all the dangers.
I just got my son a laptop for his birthday and I have been teaching him safety online
That is actually really scary. So far my boys are too young for this but I will have to be extra careful when the time comes.
OMG, That is really scary. Especially the “or else” statement. Who says that!!!
Wow. Glad my kids aren’t online yet. Definitely something I need to be aware of when they are online.
This is so scary and such a great reminder! I need to have these conversations now with my 7 year old before he takes to the online world even more!
What a great reminder. How very scary.
That is really scary! I think I would have freaked out.
I have set forth discussions of talking about online safety for years, because of my work it has been an open topic online forever now. I love that you are thinking about ways to keep kids safe online. I think no matter how careful you are and how many things you set forth for your kids, they are still kids so need to have some form of parental monitoring for sure!
That sounds like such a scary experience. I would definitely have talked with my child about it as well. Way to go mama!
Our son recently got an iPhone 6 and he has an iPad Mini for school… before he got them we sat down and had a long talk with him about privacy and online safety. Thank you for these tips!
Oh my that would freak me out! It’s so different now with kids and social media than when we were kids without it 🙁
Ack! I need to check these out! Having a blog with photos of my kids on it freaked me out a bit at first. I never use their names, but there are times I still lay at night wondering if its a good choice.