Things I Can't Say

Tips and Tales from an Introverted Mom

Each Child Is Different

Baby Planning
First Child:  Let’s stop using birth control and see what happens
Second Child: Let’s check with the calendar and plan
Third Child: Birth control? Calendar? Who has time for that stuff?

The Ultrasound
First Child: I wonder what we’re having.
Second Child: Do we have to go clothes shopping or can we use his brother’s clothes?
Third Child: Oh, thank GOD it’s just one baby in there.  I don’t care if it’s a boy or a girl: it’s just ONE. Yes, my doctor thought my third was twins.

Getting Ready for Baby
First Child: Read all the baby books, had four baby showers, got everything together, and worried
Second Child: Diaper shower, double stroller ready to go, and worried
Third Child: Huh, I wonder how we’ll fit all these kids in our vehicles. Hmmm. Who has time to worry?

The Delivery
First Child: Got to the hospital ready to push. There for less than an hour before baby was born. No time for drugs.  Hurt like nothing I’ve ever felt.
Second Child: Got to the hospital with two hours to spare. Time for a little bit of drugs. Still hurt like hell, but not as bad as first.
Third Child: Induced so I didn’t deliver him on the side of the road. Epidural. Bliss. Easiest delivery of the three, by far.

The Hospital Stay
First Child: Wanted visitors, but didn’t want to let go of my baby.  In no rush to go home.
Second Child:  Let people hold the baby. Worried about his big brother at home.
Third Child: Just wanted to go home. 36 hour mark came and we hurried home.

The First Week
First Child:  OMG, why didn’t anyone tell me how hard this was? And why does breastfeeding feel like glass being sucked out of my nipples? And why doesn’t this baby sleep? Lots of tears.
Second Child: Wow, a newborn who can sleep. This is cool. Put him in the baby carrier and let’s go.
Third Child: Oh, look at the cute baby. When I’m not too busy, I’ll stop and cuddle him.

The Milestones
First Child:  Is this normal?  Checking the books and asking his doctor to make sure everything is okay. Recording all milestones with photos and written documentation.
Second Child:  Wait, is he doing things when his brother did? Is everything okay? Is this normal?
Third Child: Eh, whatever. He’ll get it all eventually.

To my dear third child, my Cub:
yes, we were more laidback with you than we were with your brothers. We’d learned what is worth worrying about and what isn’t.  You are the last to do everything and we aren’t in a hurry to rush you to hit those milestones.  That grin of yours lets you get away with things we’d never let your brothers get away with, not even when they were your age. I see why the baby of the family is treated like the baby of the family. And we adore you! Happy third birthday!

Newborn Cub
My big boy

Comments

  1. He is such an angelpie. And so sweet – and that smile will get him anything he ever wants!

    Happy birthday to your baby!!

  2. Happy Birthday to you Sweet Baby Boy!

    My first was Planned with a capital P… it was my second that seemed to come out of nowhere…well, not nowhere, but you KWIM?

  3. LOL, ours were planned, but we didn't account for the twin part!

    Happy birthday to your 3 year old!

  4. Happy 3rd Birthday Handsome Cub.

    Wish my last one wasn't in such a hurry to not be a baby.

  5. ha! isn't it all the truth, although with my third I didn't want to go home…I knew I'd have a moment to sit down…Brooke was a different story-I was itching to get out of the hospital…
    and the holding—oh how upset I was at everyone wanting to hold MY baby…now it's all-who wants the baby?!
    Happy Birthday!!

  6. Happy 3rd birthday lil man.. look at all that hair when he was born.. how adorable

  7. So handsome!!I hope if I get around to having three, I can be more laid back than I probably will be the first and second time around!! Happy Birthday to him!!

  8. I'm so much more relaxed with my second that I'm not even sure I would mother a third. LOL

  9. Wow! The big 3! I hope he has a wonderful day. The way you shared this post is so creative! Loved learning about all the boys.

  10. Both of mine just happened. I've never been a big planner. Thank goodness God knows what we need when we need it!

    Happy Birthday to your Cub!

  13. He is soooo adorable! Your post really hit the nail on the head – I remember the first 2 hitting age 10 and the blues – and I thought I'd messed up their lives. When the 3rd did the same thing, I realized it wasn't anything I did – it was a stage! LOL

    Wishing you both a blessed birthday season!!!!!!

  17. A wonderful, wonderful, beautiful post, mama.

    I loved it.

    Happy Birthday, sweet angel.

  19. HAPPY BIRTHDAY HANDSOME little boy.

    with twins it was "almost" like having the third child after a while, I literally worry very little about lots of things, who has TIME????

    I loved this love note to your boy…who is SO ADORABLE I can't stand it!

    *MWAH* to both of you.

  20. aawww adorable
    …. I wanted a third (and a fourth) but it wasn't too be 🙁
    See you in a month!

  21. Look at all that hair! So cute! Happy birthday, Cub.

    It's crazy how things change between the first baby and the last. My doctor thought I was having twins when I was pregnant with my son. Not fun!

  22. Love this post! I've heard that what it's like with subsequent children, and you've articulated it so well and humorously 🙂

    Cub is gorgeous. Happy Birthday cutie!

  24. Happy 3rd birthday! Isn't it funny how you become better and more relaxed by the third one? I hope I learn to be that way for my next one! He's so cute!

  25. Awww, look at all that hair! What an adorable baby grown to an adorable boy. Happy Birthday to your little guy!

  26. Love this! And I so identify with the 3rd-could-be-twins thing. That was me, too. 🙂 Happy birthday to your little man!

  27. Happy Birthday, Cub! And, what a sweet post. I love this perspective on how things change from child to child – but that it doesn't mean that you love any one of them better. It's just different! And that's okay! Congratulations to you on celebrating your baby's birthday!

  29. He is adorable.
    I can imagine how he gets away with stuff.
    Happy Birthday to him!!

  30. Happy birthday to your little guy! And yes- your 1st, 2nd, 3rd child thing is so true! Though for me the second was the best delivery. Plus my baby has way more pictures than the other two- hehe so just the opposite as the norm

  31. this is one of hte best post i've read in a while!! bookmarking it for later!!

  32. 🙂 What a sweet post! Happy Birthday Cub! The Big Three!!!

    The planning is SO right! Haha! I just went off of BC and let it happen.. but, being fat in the summer isn't much fun, so we're planning the 2nd 🙂 (as much as we can)

  34. 1st planned to the milisecond. 3rd took two years. I was even offered fertility treatment. I declined. It's amazing the differences. And I love your description of what nursing feels like. My niece seems to think it won't hurt. I could write a book about her vast knowledge! hahahaha.

    Happy Birthday to your little cub. He's adorable.

  35. This is SO TRUE!! I'm pregnant with my third and felt such relief when I saw in the ultrasound it is going to be one, and not twins. I would have loved having two, but my world just got easier when I had it confirmed that it will be just one.

  38. Happy Happy birthday cutie patootie!!
    I once heard Michael J Fox say that with the first if they dropped a pacifier that they'd boil it. Second kid the pacifier would drop and they'd rinse it. 3rd kid they'd lick it off. LOL

  42. So cute…so true! I kinda wish they could all be the third child, but I guess that really could never happen. Oh well! Happy Birthday to your son!

  43. So true, so true…although I didn't have the third so my 2nd and 3rd would be combined a bit. Isn't it funny how we fuss over the first and let it go with the 2nd/3rd?

  44. I love coming to your blog! You make me feel so normal. We only have 1 kid right now, and I'm doing exactly what you did with the first! Except I'm still on the "Why would anyone want to do this again?" mentality.

    Happy Birthday, little guy!

  45. It's funny how thing are soo different with your first and you are so worried/excited about every little thing.

    My second pregnancy ultrasound went something like this

    "I hope I'm not pregnant and that the pill just messed up my period. The doctor couldn't find a heartbeat so there can't be one in there."

    to:

    "Holy Crap, why are there TWO beans on the screen?????"

  47. After my first was born, I thought I had parenting all figured out. I was wrong. Each kid is so different, that I'm on a constant learning journey!

    Happy Birthday, Cub!

  53. Awww, Happy Birthday! – totally agree- each kid is different, and our "baby" has it easy! 🙂

  56. So true! He is so stinking cute, but all of your boys are. Happy Birthday, dude.

  57. Happy 3rd birthday, Cub!

    I would have had a heart attack to think I was going from 2 to 4 kids in a snap!

  59. Happy birthday, Cub!

    I think the 3rd is more laid back cuz mom and dad are more laid back.

  60. Such a sweet little man. This post made me laugh – my poor second child will undoubtedly feel neglected someday.

  61. I just love this post….it's all SO true, isn't it?

    He's so sweet…happy 3rd birthday Cub!!!

  62. Oh my goodness, I can relate to this post so much!! My poor 3rd child must feel so neglected!

    Happy Birthday to your little guy!

  66. Happy Birthday to Cub! I am definitely more laid back now with my younger kids, but I think I am a better parent now. Live and learn!

  68. This is great, all things with the first were true (except for no time for drugs) to me and I'm assuming will progress with 2 and 3 the same way haha. Now I know why my little brother is still the baby at almost 16.

    Look at big man!

  69. Oh my gosh – this sums me up perfectly. Except for the delivery part. #1 was induced at 40 weeks and came out 14 hours later. #2 was induced at 41 weeks and came out 14 hours later. #3 was induced at 42 weeks and came out the next day. At night.

  70. SO true – all of it!

    I'll add this

    First child: Did that fall on the floor? DO NOT EAT IT! ACK!
    Second child: Ten second rule
    Third child: If the dog doesn't get it first, it's yours!

    Happy birthday to your beautiful Cub!

  72. He is too stinking cute! Happy Birthday!

    You would have rocked twins, BTW!

  74. Love this!!! inspired me to do a similar blog about #1 – #4…BIG CHANGE:)

    If I do it, I'll def. give credit where it is due:)

    adorable idea – and SO true!

  75. This is so cute! love this! You get more relaxed the more children you have, so I hear. I know that's why my little brother who is my parent's third child, got away with more. 😉