Yesterday, I was telling you all how I’ve become a hermit but that I was going to go to a cookie exchange with women that I’ve never met from a online message board.
In an effort to get to know people, I decided to go(LMAO if you really believe it’s for that reason and not because I just love cookies).
There was a list on the message board of things that people were bringing, including drinks.
But, then, yesterday morning, there’s a message that alcohol is NOT PERMITTED at the event.
WHAT is that about?
See how I’m already starting to sound like a lush, getting upset at this?
But, to tell a group of grown women that they aren’t allowed to have alcohol is ridiculous.
But, apparently, it’s one of the bylaws of the bigger organization that this message board is a part of and they got smacked down by some higher up and told that they can’t have alcohol.
Still sounding like a lush for being upset- but, when my hermit-self does get to go out, I do like to enjoy a drink or seven. No, really just one or maybe two, depending on how long I’ll be there, since I have to drive home.
I thought maybe it would be a situation where they would say that on the board and then, once we were there, the hostess would say(as I would if I were the hostess), “Sorry that I can’t serve you any alcohol. Look at all I bought for the party, sitting right there on the counter. I’m going to go over there while you fix yourself a drink. ” *insert cheesy wink here*
But, it was not to be. They stuck to their policy. CRAPTASTIC.
I’m much more relaxed when I’ve had a drink(see the whole lush thing still?). But, I didn’t know any of these women and I tend to be an introverted person. Not shy, but introverted- if you are like me, then you totally understand the difference. So, a drink helps. No, I don’t actually need one, so I guess that’s why I’m not really a lush, I just play one on tv…sound like one on my blog.
Now let’s get to the part where I sound like a snob.
I walk into a room of 11 women. I am not the type of person who is friends with everyone and just loves every single person I come into contact with.
I can be friendly to everyone, but I’m selective when it comes to whom I let into my little circle.
If you are clingy,or say really stupid things or say judgemental things(hello kettle, this is the pot…you do realize you’re black, right? Yeah, yeah, I know.), I’m probably going to scoot away from you.
If you make faces about the thought of ever having a boy, I will move away. Especially if you tell me that boys are just so gross and no fun to shop for. Thanks for your brilliant insight on my children.
If you try to engage me in a conversation about how you think that formula is evil and breast is best, while a woman in the room is bottle-feeding their baby, I will excuse myself to get a drink. Darn, have to settle for cider. I did breastfeed my babies, but I am of the mind of what you do with your boobs is your business and what I do with mine is my business(and Hubs’).
Speaking of boobies, I don’t want to see the gigantic tattoo of your husband’s name across your massive cleavage. Put that stuff away.
And, if you are not even of age yet(or even if you are, but said person was not yet 21), I do not want to hear about all the clubbing that you do and how you leave your newborn with a 12 year old babysitter while you are out getting trashed. I want A drink, not to be “smashed.” Oh and when you are talking about doing this while your Marine husband is deployed to the Middle East, I really don’t want to hear about what your cheating ass does.
I did find some nice people to talk to. They were the ones saying they wished we could have had a drink and I told them that we should spike the cider when no one was looking- and they agreed. My kind of people.
So, there you have it- me at my absolute ugliest(or close to it, anyway). I’m not always like that, but it’s a side of me that does come out sometimes and I wouldn’t be being honest with you if I pretended otherwise.