Things I Can't Say

Tips and Tales from an Introverted Mom

Where I Prefer to Be: Pour Your Heart Out

I sit slightly away from the others, reading my book.

I’m perfectly happy there.

I love to read.

And I enjoy the time when there isn’t a list of things I have to do in that moment and the kids are otherwise occupied with their practice, so there’s no one asking anything of me right then.

I love to get engrossed in the story and relish the quiet.

introvert

Or at least, the relative quiet, since the other moms nearby are talking.

Maybe even loud enough that it’s hard for me to tune them out and just enjoy my story. So, I’ll let my eyes slide into a soft focus and instead of really reading, I simply drift off into thought.

I don’t mind being there, I don’t have that need to be included in the conversation around me.

Because sometimes, I do step out of my bubble and join in.

And while occasionally, I might actually find another mom that I have a lot in common with, who says something that makes me want to yell “YES! ME, TOO!” that’s not the way it usually happens.

Instead, I say something that no one agrees with and now I’m the odd one out, even though my delivery was gentle.

Or I end up saying more than I wanted to, because I’m terrible at small talk and then there’s that awkward silence as everyone watches my face turn the color of a tomato.

Or the conversation revolves around something I actually agree with them on and that I’m upset about but after hearing what they have to say about it, I’m not just upset, I’m now all worked up, allowing their emotions to magnify mine in a way that wouldn’t happen had I just been alone with my thoughts.

And other times, I have no idea how to leave the conversation when I’m not actually leaving but just returning to my quiet spot a few feet away, at least not without seeming rude.

Which is why I usually just stay in that quiet spot to begin with.

My quiet spot where I sometimes do wonder if I’m missing out by not joining in, but where mostly, I much prefer to be.

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Comments

  3. I’m always torn at those kind of things because it’s my only chance to read or just be alone with my thoughts but then I feel guilty if I don’t attempt to make conversation or talk to the other Moms.

  4. You & me both! I hate small talk & I’m always bad about how to end conversations without it being awkward. I thought it was just me. I’m glad I’m not alone. Like you, that’s why I don’t leave my bubble as much either.

  5. I wonder sometimes if I’m missing out when I chose to stay home or don’t jump into a social situation. Mostly I think I’m not, when I want to join in I do. I just prefer not to most of the time. Besides if i was constantly joining, I would miss my alone time which would be terrible for my mental health.

  6. I like the quiet spot, too. Although maybe not always – but I do enjoy it there.

    I feel you. It’s so amazing as when I know certain people I don’t see them as quiet or introverted, and yet, we all have that side in there somewhere. ((hugs)) for those moments that are awkward, but cheers for being you and staying in your spot when you want to!

  7. I’m right there with you. Sometimes it’s easy for me to put myself out there and join in, but, I mostly prefer to just stick to myself, unless I really know the other ladies. I’m horrible at small talk too. 🙂

  8. I sometimes sit to the side like that and read too, but more because I really want to read the book than miss out on the conversation 🙂

  10. I like my bubble too and I love a quiet spot with a book and a candle and just sheer peace and quiet. Those moments are so few and far between–it’s important that we enjoy them for what they are. We can always come out of our bubbles when the time is right and when we’ve thoroughly enjoyed some much-needed me time. As a mom to young boys I’m sure you need this quiet more than ever!

    XOXO

  11. My hubby was born and raised in the south and he more or less wrote the book on being antisocial. I’ve realized he isn’t being rude, he’s the same way with his family, it just makes him uncomfortable to socialize. So I flutter, he flees. I don’t judge the moms that hang back now that I know what its like for him!

  12. Yep the south loves some good small talk! I can talk to people but I guess I don’t see the need to talk to everyone I see or all my neighbors. I’ll be cordial, and I’m not rude just don’t see the point lol.

  14. Im a born and raised Canadian living in the South… it has its challenges for me… and I love it too. It’s slowly teaching me to poke my head out of my shell. 😉 but I still keep it tucked in a lot where I like it 🙂