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June 2, 2014 by: Shell

Things You Can’t Do Once Your Child Learns to Read

As a bookworm, I have loved watching my boys grow in their reading ability. From my oldest tearing through the Harry Potter series to my middle reading any paper he gets his hands on, to my youngest amazing us with all the words he can read. Every other subject in school gets easier once you can read, so it’s a proud mama thing to watch my boys become better readers.

pete the cat reading

But once kids start to read, there are certain things you can’t do.

You can’t pretend their favorite show isn’t on. You know, the one that irritates you and makes your ears start to bleed because you can’t take listening to one of the main characters(like on Sam and Cat- WHY do they have that girl talk like that? It’s not her real voice!). But once they can read, the kids can see the show titles on the guide and will call you out on it.

You can’t pretend to be busy with your phone while they hover over you waiting for it. They now see that you are just on twitter, reading other people’s tweets, not actually doing any work.

You can’t stop and read those hilarious but totally inappropriate lists that you get sucked into on facebook. Even if they might not know all the words, those are not where you want them to practice their “sounding it out” skills.

You can’t say that Chuck E. Cheese(or whatever place you really don’t want to go to) is closed. They can read the sign. They can probably even google the hours.

You can’t email a complaint to their teacher. They’ll read it over your shoulder and start asking questions.

You can’t just leave your computer up on whatever it is you were last working on. Not unless you are 100% okay with them reading what’s on the screen.

You can’t say “oh just read it to me” when they tell you you have a new text. They’re able to and you’d think that this would be a bonus, especially if you are driving. But unless no one ever sends you inappropriate texts(thanks, Hubs), this isn’t a good idea.

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Comments

  1. Tracie says

    June 2, 2014 at 8:04 am

    This is so true! I especially have to watch what is on the computer screen when I walk away from it – especially if I’m just on facebook, because scary stuff can pop up there. Well, usually hilarious for me, but scary when I think about my ten year old reading it! 

  2. thedoseofreality says

    June 2, 2014 at 10:01 am

    You are SO RIGHT! Just yesterday I was attempting to send a FB message to classmate’s mom, and my older one was totally reading over my shoulder. So annoying!!-Ashley

  3. Diana says

    June 2, 2014 at 10:04 am

    Ok I guess I pretty luck.  I don’t receive inappropriate texts.  Having the boys able to read the texts and respond is awesome.  Remainder of your list is very true.  

  4. Kay Adeola says

    June 2, 2014 at 10:38 am

    Lol yep you are so right,though i do not get inappropriate texts i like my oldest being able to reply for me while i am busy doing something else,The other good thing is when i get asked questions that i also do not know the answer to (i pretend i do) i tell them the only way they will learn it is to go online and search it themselves lol.

  5. VandyJ says

    June 2, 2014 at 11:30 am

    The TV one gets us all the time. We can still skip for Bruiser, but Turbo calls us on it all the time. They haven’t started reading over my shoulder yet, but I imagine that day is coming.

  6. Robin (Masshole Mommy) says

    June 2, 2014 at 12:51 pm

    Tell me about it.  My youngest just learned to read this past year and he’s a little wiz at it, so we can’t get away with anything anymore.

  7. JDaniel4's Mom says

    June 2, 2014 at 1:10 pm

    The end is near for me too. JDaniel has become a good reader this year.

  8. Autumn says

    June 2, 2014 at 1:16 pm

    Haha! These are all good points – I’d add that you can’t spell out words or phrases anymore, either. For instance, my daughter is about to go to the d-o-c-t-o-r for some s-h-o-t-s. 😉 

  9. Carolyn Y says

    June 2, 2014 at 1:16 pm

    So true, + we can’t spell things out over dinner like we used to because now Julia knows what we are saying 🙁

  10. Krystyn @ Really, Are You Serious? says

    June 2, 2014 at 1:48 pm

    Oh, and you can’t spell things out anymore, either. It’s nearly impossible to have a conversation that my kids aren’t in on now.

  11. Christie says

    June 2, 2014 at 1:58 pm

    So true! My son caught me recently when he read the sign back to me. OUCH 🙂

  12. Lindsey says

    June 2, 2014 at 2:30 pm

    Hilarious. All true. Now more faking it.

  13. aimee fauci says

    June 2, 2014 at 2:55 pm

    Loved the day when my girls learned how to read but you are so right! Too often times I would and will find my 7 year old..aka ears… over my shoulder reading my emails! 

  14. Allison B says

    June 2, 2014 at 3:08 pm

    Yep I got burned by my oldest over Christmas when we made an activity calendar countdown to Christmas. It said we were going to make a pine cone craft but I was not in the mood to craft with my kids so I said we were going to read a book. I was busted! She called me on it instantly. I blame myself, I should have known in November when I created the thing that I wouldn’t want to craft with my kids. 

  15. Kecia says

    June 2, 2014 at 3:51 pm

    I have mixed feelings about those days. We don’t have readers yet, but it won’t be long. I will miss being able to spell things to keep my 3 year old from hearing.

  16. Jaime says

    June 2, 2014 at 4:19 pm

    All great points. 🙂 We don’t have cable, so most of our tv is done through Netflix or Hulu. Right now, I tell my toddler that it isn’t working, so we don’t watch certain shows in the mornings!

  17. Stacey says

    June 2, 2014 at 5:37 pm

    LOL I love this list! It is so true. There have been a few times that I was a little concerned about the content of Hubs texts, so I made my daughter text that it was her so he would be appropriate! LOL 

  18. Clancy Cash Harrison MS, RD, LDN says

    June 2, 2014 at 6:22 pm

    This post is too funny. We are just now getting to “that” stage where my daughter is catching on more and more. We have to be so careful now.

  19. Felicia says

    June 2, 2014 at 7:04 pm

    YOu also can’t let them have your phone while your husband and friends text you!  Oh my stars!

  20. Debbie Denny says

    June 2, 2014 at 7:28 pm

    So funny and so true!. Love the post

  21. Kiwi says

    June 2, 2014 at 7:29 pm

    I love the theme of your blog! I didnt realize that reading was such a big deal to parents as you all do a lot of “lying” to them when they dont know how to read! LOL I was laughing most of the blog post but its cute! How about not spelling out curse words…my friend did that once and her son figured it out and said it back to her! it was hilarious…she stop spelling out curse words and just talked in code!

  22. ajackeduppeach says

    June 2, 2014 at 8:05 pm

    lol my 5 year old stepson is learning how to read. i enjoy hearing him sound things out. however we can no longer spell things around him.

  23. Debbie L. says

    June 2, 2014 at 9:27 pm

    Nice list…I love to read to the kids. I don;t think that will ever end. 

  24. Terry says

    June 2, 2014 at 9:32 pm

    I remember those days when I had to watch what I wrote and what book was laying around. When I had my daughter, computer was just coming out.

  25. Jeanine @ sixtimemommy.com says

    June 2, 2014 at 9:56 pm

    Yep! We’ve found this out recently too. No spelling things, or sounding things half out either :/

  26. Melissa says

    June 2, 2014 at 10:09 pm

    Haha, I love this! It’s so true, my son can totally read thee TV guide. 

  27. Krystal says

    June 2, 2014 at 10:40 pm

    My son is too young to read but LOVES going through the books and pointing at the characters. I can’t wait until he can read! 

  28. valmg @ Mom Knows It All says

    June 2, 2014 at 11:20 pm

    I guess I’m in the minority. I love listening to my son and his favorite show, it makes me feel completely relaxed. And my computer is on and open constantly.

  29. Jenn @ The Rebel Chick says

    June 2, 2014 at 11:21 pm

    Interesting points! My daughter is in her teens and things were very different when she was a child.

  30. Piera says

    June 3, 2014 at 12:38 am

    LOL! Reading definitely changes so much! I especially love this one: 

    “You can’t pretend to be busy with your phone while they hover over you waiting for it. They now see that you are just on twitter, reading other people’s tweets, not actually doing any work.”

    This = ME. ; )

  31. April says

    June 3, 2014 at 1:49 am

    LOL! This is a great post! So true!!!

  32. Alison says

    June 3, 2014 at 4:06 am

    Hah! So all those things you got away with – no way Jose, eh? 🙂
    We have to spell things out now that both my kids understand a lot of what we used to discuss freely in front of them 🙂

  33. mary says

    June 3, 2014 at 8:12 am

    Hubby and I came up with our own language once the kiddos learned to spell/read. LOL. My oldest figured it out eventually, but the 3 youngest are still clueless

  34. Janel (A Mom's Take) says

    June 3, 2014 at 8:42 am

    Haha. I just got the book for my oldest. It’s funny because once your kids can read you can’t spell outloud to hide what you’re saying. I find that out the hard way.

  35. Virginia @thatbaldchick says

    June 3, 2014 at 9:51 am

    My son has been reading for quite some time now. Gone are the days when I could spell something to my husband to keep him from getting it.

  36. Amanda says

    June 3, 2014 at 11:18 am

    My son loves to read!  I’m so blessed that he loves to read!  

  37. Jenni E. {Sweet Pennies from Heaven} says

    June 3, 2014 at 12:21 pm

    This is so funny and TRUE! It cracks me up when you get to that stage where you can’t spell certain words anymore because they know what you’re spelling.

  38. Liz Mays says

    June 3, 2014 at 12:40 pm

    LOL, it’s a whole new world when they know what we and everyone else is up to. But yay for reading!

  39. Ann Bacciaglia says

    June 3, 2014 at 12:50 pm

    My kids are older and I forgot about this important step. Now I remember what it is like 🙂

  40. Ashley M says

    June 3, 2014 at 1:37 pm

    You’re making me rethink my stance on fostering a love of reading. Lol I’m kidding but seriously thats one aspect of it I hadnt thought ot. 

  41. julie gardner says

    June 3, 2014 at 1:44 pm

    When my nephew turned five (13 years ago), we had a satellite radio station playing music on our television. We’d picked a channel that bleeped out any bad words from the songs but Jordan had learned to read, so when Justin Timberlake’s “Cry Me A River” came up on the screen, my nephew asked me, “Aunt Julie, what does ‘The No-Ass edit’ mean?”

    It wasn’t awkward at ALL!

  42. Krissy says

    June 3, 2014 at 2:00 pm

    haha, isn’t that the truth?! My son is starting to read more and more, and it’s hard to ‘fib’ to him about anything… or skip pages in really, really, REALLY long books when I am really just wanting to go to bed. lol.

  43. tee mccluskey says

    June 3, 2014 at 2:28 pm

    This is a funny but true list! I have so many of the same issues!

  44. Dina says

    June 3, 2014 at 2:29 pm

    I used to spell things to my hubby. Want to go to the p a r k? can’t do that anymore!

  45. Veronica says

    June 3, 2014 at 2:53 pm

    Funny! Lol. The kicker is when they can spell. I got caught once when my daughter was little, not realizing she knew how to spell a “bad” word I didn’t want to say in front of her but instead spelt it

  46. Natalie says

    June 3, 2014 at 3:43 pm

    That’s true! I never thought of that…my oldest is spelling every sign everywhere we go…so I know it’s just a matter of time until he starts memorizes words. Think he’s going to be a bookworm like his mom! Any new book suggestions? I’m almost done with one!

  47. Cam | Bibs and Baubles says

    June 3, 2014 at 4:28 pm

    So true! Literacy is a blessing and a curse! LOL!

  48. Cassie @ Southeast by Midwest says

    June 3, 2014 at 5:03 pm

    My mom found this out the hard way with all of her kids. We learned to spell, count, and tell time fairly early on and always called her when she lied.

  49. Carly Bellard says

    June 3, 2014 at 11:36 pm

    Yeah…. we have just hit the age where she is learning to spell. The kid heard us spelling I-C-E C-R-E-A-M and about 30 minutes later she had us all in the car and heading to the scoop shop.

  50. Tonia says

    June 4, 2014 at 10:42 am

    Isn’t this the truth! My kid has read out an inappropriate text message without me even asking. SMH

  51. Janeane Davis says

    June 6, 2014 at 12:59 pm

    You are right. This is a fun list of things that are off the table once we have children.

  52. Christina S says

    June 6, 2014 at 4:23 pm

    This is hilarious and I had to read it aloud to my hubby. Something we get to look forward to! 🙁

  53. Roxanne says

    June 6, 2014 at 6:01 pm

    This is pretty funny. I remember the change when my son started reading EVERYTHING. And you can’t spell words in front of them anymore either. They’re like, “Mom, I know what that word is. You really shouldn’t say that.” Or is that just my kid? Yes, my kid censors me.

Welcome to Things I Can't Say: Tips and Tales from an Introverted Mom. I'm Shell. Boy mom, beach girl, bookworm, ball games, baker, brand ambassador, Thinking yoga, food, and travel should start with "b," too. Finding the easiest way to do some things while overthinking so many others. Read More…

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