Things I Can't Say

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September 14, 2012 by: Shell

Things They Can’t Say: My Suitcase Full of Tricks

Attention expectant mamas and those with babies/toddlers under age 18 months- please fill out this form to be considered for a fun opportunity!


I’m Ali, a mom of 3 with a full-time job and a neglected blog. I started writing My Suitcase Full of Tricks after friends said that my Facebook status updates were worthy of a book (or a reality show). A blog is more my speed. I love sushi, slushees and the dog hair tumbleweeds that cover my house.

Several weeks ago, Shell invited me to post on her blog via a very buttoned-up email containing her guest posting guidelines. After doing a little happy dance (true story), I told her I’d take a look. With that she commented “I finally figured out to just put the answers to the questions everyone asks in one spot instead of typing out a long email. I am lazy.”

“Shell lazy?” LAZY? Is she kidding?

I admit I don’t excel in many areas, but I’ve got Shell and probably all of you completely beat in the laziness arena. So in the true spirit of “Things I Can’t Say”…or better yet, “Things I Shouldn’t Say,” I, Ali, confess that I am LAZY. There I said it! I’m the Queen of Half-Assery.

My mother, husband and over 50 teachers will attest to the fact that I under-extend myself.  There is family folklore that when I was finally old enough to babysit my siblings, I made them fetch magazines for me while I watched TV. I recall none of this.

In my defense, I’m not sure that “lazy” is a fair assessment. Perhaps “selectively motivated” or “hard work averse” or “gifted in resting” describe my talent more appropriately. I’m all for getting an important job done when absolutely, I mean ABSOLUTLEY, necessary, but I’m a firm believer that if I can get by with “good enough,” I will every time!

Here are a few examples of things I’ve done that might qualify as lazy. You be the judge:

– Rather than getting the milk out again, when Kid #1 finished his breakfast, I poured new cereal into his used milk and gave it to Kid #2. More than once.

– I’ve been known to type “Happy Birthday” onto a person’s Facebook wall and then copy and paste the same “Happy Birthday” for three other people. Lazy?

– My house cleaning philosophy for when company comes is “Just pick up the big chunks” – only the stuff people will notice. They’re not going to inspect the floor, so no need to mop it.

– I’d rather put a sweatshirt on over my shirt (one step) than to take my shirt off, put on a bra and then have to put the shirt back on. The fewer steps the better.

So why am I telling you all of this? There’s something I want you to consider about other moms like me: Her qualities that one might define as “lazy,” she might consider God-given talents supporting her true passion for rest. You might choose to exercise, scrapbook or read. The thing I truly love is relaxing. I should start a movement to make relaxing an acceptable hobby! It’s taken years of practice perfecting the skills of prioritization, delegation and hitting the snooze button with the lightning fast reflexes of a ninja.

I encourage you to all take a proverbial page out of my book. Of course it is a really short imaginary Cliffs Notes size book because I’d be too lazy to write an imaginary book any longer. Now if you’ll excuse me I’m gonna go take a nap.

Be sure to leave Ali some comment love here and then go visit My Suitcase Full of Tricks!

Hello Better
Lost with a GPS

Comments

  1. Ali says

    September 14, 2012 at 7:21 am

    Woo hoo! I love being the first one to leave a comment. Thanks so much Shell for having my here on your awesome blog. It’s like spending the day at a fancy hotel. 

    • Ali says

      September 14, 2012 at 7:21 am

      …and of course by “my” I meant “me.” Too early…

  2. Barbara says

    September 14, 2012 at 7:23 am

    I love Ali! They totally should make relaxing a hobby.

    • Ali says

      September 14, 2012 at 5:17 pm

      And I love you too, but we established that long ago!

  3. Caitlin MidAtlantic says

    September 14, 2012 at 8:50 am

    I, too am hard work intolerant and gifted in resting! Great post!

    • Ali says

      September 14, 2012 at 5:18 pm

      We should start a club. You’re in charge of getting the t-shirts printed. 

  4. ilene says

    September 14, 2012 at 9:15 am

    I’m not sure if lazy fits anyone who works full time, blogs, and has 3 kids, but I love the term selectively motivated! 

    • Ali says

      September 14, 2012 at 5:19 pm

      OK, then we’ll switch “lazy” to “crazy!”

  5. MommaKiss says

    September 14, 2012 at 9:18 am

    Ali, you and your passion for his enough are right up my ally.

    Oh I rhymed. Ali. Ally. Ha!!

    Also.

    Who needs a bra anyway.

    • Ali says

      September 14, 2012 at 5:20 pm

      I certainly don’t. These 32 A tatas don’t really need to be contained. 

  6. Paula @ Simply Sandwich says

    September 14, 2012 at 9:18 am

    I vote for resting as a hobby too! 🙂

    • Ali says

      September 14, 2012 at 5:33 pm

      Come over to the dark side Paula. 

  7. Leigh Ann says

    September 14, 2012 at 9:21 am

    This post is awesome and so how I feel! We need to start a movement celebrating laziness. I noticed I just place the folded laundry on top of all the disheveled clothes in the dresser bc I’m too lazy to fix them…when I even get around to folding the laundry.

    • Ali says

      September 14, 2012 at 5:30 pm

      Eh. They  get messed up anyway. Eventually they’ll get worn. 

  8. Susi says

    September 14, 2012 at 9:35 am

    I’ll happily take a page out of your book Ali. It feels like I could use a good dose of just plain relaxation right now.  As for using milk again… why waste it when another child will eat it??? 😉 Have a good weekend.

    • Ali says

      September 14, 2012 at 5:32 pm

      I know. Some cow worked really hard to make that milk. That would have been an insult to the cow. 

  9. JDaniel4's Mom says

    September 14, 2012 at 10:11 am

    I am with everyone resting should be hobby and my four year old should want to participate in it.

    • Ali says

      September 14, 2012 at 5:34 pm

      HA! You’re right. Let’s try to make a game out of our new hobby. 

  10. Seams Happy says

    September 14, 2012 at 10:19 am

    I agree relaxing should be a recognized hobby. I might take it a step further and call it an art form. With so much grabbing for our attention, it takes real skill to ignore it all and just chill.  I am working on it and there are those who say I am quite good. 

    • Ali says

      September 14, 2012 at 5:36 pm

      Yeah, a skill. I’m going with that! 

  11. Natalie says

    September 14, 2012 at 10:55 am

    Ha ha these are some great tips…I am taking notes from you Ali 🙂 It’s all about getting by right?

    • Ali says

      September 14, 2012 at 5:38 pm

      You don’t qualify for part of the lazy club Natalie. You have an infant. You’re going to have to wait it out until he’s at least 2 before you can start neglecting him. 

  12. Melanie says

    September 14, 2012 at 11:05 am

    So funny! I thought I was the laziest mom ever. I’m glad to be in good company.

    • Ali says

      September 14, 2012 at 5:36 pm

      Good company indeed! 

  13. Jennifer says

    September 14, 2012 at 11:16 am

    I would not call that lazy. I call it efficient and using resources wisely.

    • Ali says

      September 14, 2012 at 5:30 pm

      I like the way you think!!!

  14. Emmy says

    September 14, 2012 at 11:30 am

    Gifted in resting!! Love love it! You should hurry and coin that term.

    • Ali says

      September 14, 2012 at 5:31 pm

      I mean, really! I’m awesome at it. Coining it now. Feel free to use it. 

  15. Carrie says

    September 14, 2012 at 11:42 am

    “Gifted in resting!” Ha! What a wonderfully P.C. term! I love it!! Since you are so lazy Ali, what is your secret to staying so slim then? 🙂

    • Ali says

      September 14, 2012 at 5:32 pm

      Maybe because I’m not eating when I’m resting? Nah, good genes. 

  16. NaDell says

    September 14, 2012 at 12:04 pm

    Wait, doesn’t everyone know the awesomeness that is copy and paste???  I always do that on birthdays, but I have to think if any of the two birthdays know each other so I can change the “hope your day is terrific” to “hope your day is excellent” or something.  Very rarely, I’ll say something else (like to a sibling.)
    I do a lot most of the day, but LOVE that naptime, even with four kids, maybe especially with four kids!

    • Ali says

      September 14, 2012 at 5:34 pm

      We’re geniuses!

  17. Making It Work Mom says

    September 14, 2012 at 5:15 pm

    I call it time management or conserving my energy (you know for when I really need it). The sweatshirt thing – I do it all the time! So much easier and more comfortable!

    • Ali says

      September 14, 2012 at 5:35 pm

      Except I live in Florida and I’m often wearing a sweatshirt in 90 degree heat 🙂 

  18. Jessica says

    September 14, 2012 at 9:36 pm

    I can get on this lazy bandwagon. 

    Now, how can I get the kids to understand. 

  19. Jenna says

    September 14, 2012 at 9:44 pm

    I am the same way, I enjoy relaxing.  My motto…

    Work smarter, Not harder.

  20. Cyndy says

    September 15, 2012 at 4:43 pm

    I am with ya 100%!  But I like to use prettier words like instead of lazy, you are CONSERVATIVE.  You conserved milk by reusing it.  You conserve your energy by copy & pasting those Happy Birthdays.  Conservation is all the rage!  Embrace it!!

  21. angela says

    September 15, 2012 at 8:23 pm

    Relaxing is all about conserving energy. You are an environmentalist!!

  22. Jen {at} take2mommy says

    September 16, 2012 at 8:50 am

    Genius! Love this post and love the idea of starting a movement pro-laziness… I mean, pro-relaxation.
    She’s not “lazy”…She’s just “supporting her true passion for rest.” Love that. You should be a politician 🙂

  23. Danyelle Franciosa says

    September 17, 2012 at 1:34 am

    I also love to relax and I consider it as a hobby. I cannot resist it but relaxing makes me feel as a whole. My mind is intact and my whole being is entirely stress free

  24. StylinMom says

    September 17, 2012 at 12:39 pm

    I’m not sure if you let men into your group but man my husband could be your token male…geesh he has made an occupation out of relaxing!! Lol lol Great post!!!!
    Made me LOL!!
    M

  25. AJ Collins says

    September 17, 2012 at 3:08 pm

    This is not exactly me… but this made me laugh because I am actually writing a post this week (eventually) about Rest. Someone recently told me I am really good at resting. I took a moment to consider if it was a compliment or an insult, but got bored, so I guess it was a compliment. 😉 Great post! Perfect celebration of a positive character trait many people don’t encourage.

  26. Marianne says

    September 19, 2012 at 1:22 am

    My husband has turned releaxing into an artform as well. I’m all about the good nap. It’s what’s been missing from my life this past week and a half. Wait. I think you just inspired my post for tomorrow. Thanks, Ali!!

  27. just JENNIFER says

    September 23, 2012 at 1:38 pm

    I agree with you Ali, not necessarily “lazy”. You’re efficient!

  28. Kristen says

    September 25, 2012 at 10:38 am

    Cliff notes! I had forgotten all about those. They were my best friend in high school. I have to say that I really do need to take a page out of your Cliff Notes. I have been trying lately and it has helped over the last week to calm me down and not act so crabby. Notice I said “so” crabby?! 😉

Welcome to Things I Can't Say: Tips and Tales from an Introverted Mom. I'm Shell. Boy mom, beach girl, bookworm, ball games, baker, brand ambassador, Thinking yoga, food, and travel should start with "b," too. Finding the easiest way to do some things while overthinking so many others. Read More…

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