Things I Can't Say

Tips and Tales from an Introverted Mom

Things They Can’t Say: My Suitcase Full of Tricks

Attention expectant mamas and those with babies/toddlers under age 18 months- please fill out this form to be considered for a fun opportunity!


I’m Ali, a mom of 3 with a full-time job and a neglected blog. I started writing My Suitcase Full of Tricks after friends said that my Facebook status updates were worthy of a book (or a reality show). A blog is more my speed. I love sushi, slushees and the dog hair tumbleweeds that cover my house.

Several weeks ago, Shell invited me to post on her blog via a very buttoned-up email containing her guest posting guidelines. After doing a little happy dance (true story), I told her I’d take a look. With that she commented “I finally figured out to just put the answers to the questions everyone asks in one spot instead of typing out a long email. I am lazy.”

“Shell lazy?” LAZY? Is she kidding?

I admit I don’t excel in many areas, but I’ve got Shell and probably all of you completely beat in the laziness arena. So in the true spirit of “Things I Can’t Say”…or better yet, “Things I Shouldn’t Say,” I, Ali, confess that I am LAZY. There I said it! I’m the Queen of Half-Assery.

My mother, husband and over 50 teachers will attest to the fact that I under-extend myself.  There is family folklore that when I was finally old enough to babysit my siblings, I made them fetch magazines for me while I watched TV. I recall none of this.

In my defense, I’m not sure that “lazy” is a fair assessment. Perhaps “selectively motivated” or “hard work averse” or “gifted in resting” describe my talent more appropriately. I’m all for getting an important job done when absolutely, I mean ABSOLUTLEY, necessary, but I’m a firm believer that if I can get by with “good enough,” I will every time!

Here are a few examples of things I’ve done that might qualify as lazy. You be the judge:

– Rather than getting the milk out again, when Kid #1 finished his breakfast, I poured new cereal into his used milk and gave it to Kid #2. More than once.

– I’ve been known to type “Happy Birthday” onto a person’s Facebook wall and then copy and paste the same “Happy Birthday” for three other people. Lazy?

– My house cleaning philosophy for when company comes is “Just pick up the big chunks” – only the stuff people will notice. They’re not going to inspect the floor, so no need to mop it.

– I’d rather put a sweatshirt on over my shirt (one step) than to take my shirt off, put on a bra and then have to put the shirt back on. The fewer steps the better.

So why am I telling you all of this? There’s something I want you to consider about other moms like me: Her qualities that one might define as “lazy,” she might consider God-given talents supporting her true passion for rest. You might choose to exercise, scrapbook or read. The thing I truly love is relaxing. I should start a movement to make relaxing an acceptable hobby! It’s taken years of practice perfecting the skills of prioritization, delegation and hitting the snooze button with the lightning fast reflexes of a ninja.

I encourage you to all take a proverbial page out of my book. Of course it is a really short imaginary Cliffs Notes size book because I’d be too lazy to write an imaginary book any longer. Now if you’ll excuse me I’m gonna go take a nap.

Be sure to leave Ali some comment love here and then go visit My Suitcase Full of Tricks!

Comments

  1. Woo hoo! I love being the first one to leave a comment. Thanks so much Shell for having my here on your awesome blog. It’s like spending the day at a fancy hotel. 

  7. This post is awesome and so how I feel! We need to start a movement celebrating laziness. I noticed I just place the folded laundry on top of all the disheveled clothes in the dresser bc I’m too lazy to fix them…when I even get around to folding the laundry.

  8. I’ll happily take a page out of your book Ali. It feels like I could use a good dose of just plain relaxation right now.  As for using milk again… why waste it when another child will eat it??? 😉 Have a good weekend.

  10. I agree relaxing should be a recognized hobby. I might take it a step further and call it an art form. With so much grabbing for our attention, it takes real skill to ignore it all and just chill.  I am working on it and there are those who say I am quite good. 

    • You don’t qualify for part of the lazy club Natalie. You have an infant. You’re going to have to wait it out until he’s at least 2 before you can start neglecting him. 

  15. “Gifted in resting!” Ha! What a wonderfully P.C. term! I love it!! Since you are so lazy Ali, what is your secret to staying so slim then? 🙂

  16. Wait, doesn’t everyone know the awesomeness that is copy and paste???  I always do that on birthdays, but I have to think if any of the two birthdays know each other so I can change the “hope your day is terrific” to “hope your day is excellent” or something.  Very rarely, I’ll say something else (like to a sibling.)
    I do a lot most of the day, but LOVE that naptime, even with four kids, maybe especially with four kids!

  20. I am with ya 100%!  But I like to use prettier words like instead of lazy, you are CONSERVATIVE.  You conserved milk by reusing it.  You conserve your energy by copy & pasting those Happy Birthdays.  Conservation is all the rage!  Embrace it!!

  22. Genius! Love this post and love the idea of starting a movement pro-laziness… I mean, pro-relaxation.
    She’s not “lazy”…She’s just “supporting her true passion for rest.” Love that. You should be a politician 🙂

  23. I also love to relax and I consider it as a hobby. I cannot resist it but relaxing makes me feel as a whole. My mind is intact and my whole being is entirely stress free

  24. I’m not sure if you let men into your group but man my husband could be your token male…geesh he has made an occupation out of relaxing!! Lol lol Great post!!!!
    Made me LOL!!
    M

  25. This is not exactly me… but this made me laugh because I am actually writing a post this week (eventually) about Rest. Someone recently told me I am really good at resting. I took a moment to consider if it was a compliment or an insult, but got bored, so I guess it was a compliment. 😉 Great post! Perfect celebration of a positive character trait many people don’t encourage.

  26. My husband has turned releaxing into an artform as well. I’m all about the good nap. It’s what’s been missing from my life this past week and a half. Wait. I think you just inspired my post for tomorrow. Thanks, Ali!!

  28. Cliff notes! I had forgotten all about those. They were my best friend in high school. I have to say that I really do need to take a page out of your Cliff Notes. I have been trying lately and it has helped over the last week to calm me down and not act so crabby. Notice I said “so” crabby?! 😉