Things I Can't Say

Tips and Tales from an Introverted Mom

The Writer’s Breath

things they can't sayChris Carter is a SAHM of two pretty amazing grade school kids. She has been writing at TheMomCafe.com for almost three years, where she hopes to encourage mothers everywhere through her humor, inspiration and faith.

Something happens. There’s magic in that moment. It hits. Awakens a part of you that goes beyond your moving, doing, and living and scuffling around in this world. You recognize it well. It’s magnitude takes over. It awakens a distinguishable gasp of breath that you wrestle to hold in… until you are able to let it out. You wait impatiently, as you finish this and that and take care of what is in front of you that calls for you to be removed from those depths that only you can dwell. You quiver and squirm with discomfort while holding it in, pushing it down, keeping it captive until it can be freed.

It whispers, seeps a quiet desperation, begging to come out. At times, it screams “NOW!” and yet, the moment has yet to come, where you can find room to release and redeem the suffocating air building pressure and pain if not liberated in time.

It swirls in twisted turmoil, pressing the urgency while it waits its turn.

You can taste its goodness, as its sweet vapors permeate a mist that lingers into your moving, doing, and living.

Not yet.

Time rolls on, ragged and worn from the fight- you are ready to surrender, to submit to its power.

You sit at the keyboard, shaking, panting gasping for the breath.

The-Writers-Breath

And you exhale.

The breath bursts forth with a frantic furry, pouring out words, placing each one in sequence and rhythm, painting a picture of within. You beckon the gasping air to slow to a steady pace, not hurried with haste… or it will lead to impulsive virtue. You wind through phrases and pieces of fragments that string together to create a tone, a voice, a message. One deliberate detail has the ability to change the purpose of your meaning. One fine line, one distinct turn, forms your language… revealing its profound power. Your creation is unfolding from the depths of who you are. The crevices crack open, and you carefully choose to smooth them over, or bare their vulnerability with risk.

Your intensity lessons, as your spirit lightens and loosens its grip on the joy that rises from the bounds and barriers that are now broken. You marvel at your work, with deep criticism and delicate delight. You tweak and twist to form layers of color, clarity and above all consciousness. You allow the breath to dissipate as you inhale new air. The thunder has grown distant, but the lightening still prevails with spears of excitement and wonder of the gift you have delivered.

Who will receive it?

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Comments

  1. LOL, I have been blogging for over 4 years now and I don’t think I have ever experienced such passion about writing a post.  I feel like maybe I should and I’m missing out on something 🙂

  2. Yes. I breathe the Writer’s Breath! Without a doubt…to my soul. I understand exactly what you’ve described, in quite the titillating manner might I add, and I felt every word of it. Are you and Lizzi eating at the same restaurant or something? I’ll have what you guys are having!! haha! xoxo

    • Thanks so much Angela!!! Yes- sometimes I get wrapped around the words so much that I either strangle the ‘breath’ or it dissipates too soon… But oh that initial surge is amazing!! XOXOXO

  4. This describes it perfectly.  So perfectly.  You are deliberate and articulate with everything you write and writing about writing?  No different. 

  5. I agree with Robin; while I enjoy writing and blogging, I guess I’m just not a true writer who experiences this feeling. I do enjoy it though, and enjoy reading posts like this from real writers who inspire me. 🙂

    • I feel just the same, Alesha! Once in a while I think I’ve had an inkling of writer’s breath. Sigh.

      • You may experience something totally different, and maybe I wouldn’t have THAT…. each of us has places in our lives where we can experience such passion. This just is mine, but that doesn’t make you any LESS of a writer. You just have a different experience wrapped around your craft! 🙂

    • AW Alesha, you are so kind to call me a ‘real writer’!! I think anyone who writes should be called a ‘writer’- period! I think just like any other art, it comes in various shapes and sizes with a wide spectrum of emotion and depth. My writing is such that it comes from deep within- so THAT is where my passion breathes.
      There are countless writers out there- that may not go ‘there’- but nonetheless, they have a message to share and WRITE to share it. 🙂

  6. there are so many days when i sit down and think now what? So true nice to know I’m not the only one! 

    • Yeah- I get that Tiffany! When the ‘feeling’ or ‘inspiration’ doesn’t come, it’s almost impossible to create something from nothing. I suppose everyone goes through that in whatever pursuit they are in, right? We just have to endure that stuck season and it always seems to pass- in time!

  8. I, for one, am so thankful every time you sit down and let the words pour out of you onto the screen…because that means I get to read it. I just adore your writing and the voice you’ve found with it. XOXOXO –Lisa

    • Oh my heart!! Thank you thank you thank you…. a thousand times over sweet friend!! Do you know how much that means to me???!!! I adore you.

  9. This is an amazing post! I, too, definitely don’t feel the writer’s breath.  I get that feeling when I’m doing a craft though or creating something for a party!  Sometimes the words just don’t flow like I would like them too.

    • That’s probably where your passion lies the strongest, in the art of crafts and creating for a party!! Maybe the writing part is simply the ‘functional’ bridge to get your art communicated from you to others. A necessity, but your heart is truly in the making more than the writing. 🙂

  10. I truly have had these moments and will say I love writing and all the emotions that come with it – the good, the bad and the ugly.  I seriously wouldn’t trade it for the world!! 🙂

    • Oh how I LOVE reading humorous writings!! Some people have SUCH A gift for that!! There is most definitely a fire in those lines that just nail the funny, ya know? I adore humor blogs!! Oh, how I love to laugh! I sometimes go ‘there’ too… and it’s SO MUCH FUN!

  12. I wish I could say I felt as passionately as you do about writing! Though there are times I sit there, clicking on the screen and then all of the sudden it comes to me and I’m off! 

  14. ‘Writer’s Breath’ is it? That gentle whisper on the back of your neck, lifting the small hairs there, as the imagination rouses, and feels the muse come closer…

    …goosebumps. HELL YES I know this…

    MMmmmmmm I know this.

    • Oh do I KNOW you KNOW THIS!!!!!!! More than anyone I can think of, you of ALL people breath DEEP, long, sometimes trembling breaths… that often take MY breath away. That’s the good stuff right there. ****LOVE****

    • Well I think there are SO many blogs with SO many venues, ya know? I am an inspirational writer, so ya kinda need that inspiration piece!! LOL It comes up like this. 🙂

  17. When I am inspired, I write and I write faster than my fingers can type! I love the feeling of words pouring out of my fingers and I really hope others enjoy the read. 

    • Oh how I get that Aimee!! That’s why I put that part about slowing the pace down… because sometimes I am literally frantic and go in hyper mode with that intensity- and I can’t keep up with myself! I love that you get that!

  18. Maybe if I stick with this blogging thing I will finally have a day (or even hour) like that.  Until then I will enjoy reading the beautiful words you write and just keep rambling on my site.

  19. ****You can taste its goodness, as its sweet vapors permeate a mist that lingers into your moving, doing, and living.*** Will I receive it? YES. YES. Yes. xx

  20. Interesting take on writing.  I know most days writing feels more like a chore than anything, unless I’m really ticked off about something, in which case, I can write for DAYS.

    • The hardest time to write, is when you don’t have that initial inspiring ‘aha’ moment, ya know? I have those days too, Rachael. So I just wait… until the Writer’s Breath comes.

  22. My sister is a writer and I know she’s felt the same way as you before. I blog, but I don’t consider myself a writer. I just love to share ideas with people.

    • Well, I do consider you a writer- just in a different sense- I think there are SO many amazing writers out there that use their craft for a reason- whatever the message or means to convey ‘something’. That in itself is an art of writing- just depends on the intention of the words. Either way- someone who uses words for a reason or mission or purpose is, I believe… A writer!!

  23. Even though I blog I wouldn’t consider myself a writer as much as a communicator. I love speaking about things I’m passionate about, but when it comes to writing not as much. I love how you shared your passion with us, so descriptive, thank you for that piece of you.

    • Jennifer, you may all your passion in speaking perhaps?? I love that you consider yourself a communicator… so many mediums in that purpose! You can use all your gifts that way… writing included, and yet speaking is what seems to light your fire!

  24. I like this post.  I have a 3 month old and didn’t blog for about 2 months.  Now, I have all the ideas ever, but not enough time!

    • Oh yes, have I been THERE!! Just jot down ideas as best you can… and when your busy mama season winds down, you will have them to go to again. They will still be every bit as good down the road!!

    • Thanks so much Melissa!!! I am just in one of those waves of passionate pouring- for now. I know that my ‘sometimes’ will come too. Everything always vacillates… 🙂

  26. I feel this way about some of my blog posts. There are topics that I’m so passionate about, and I have many posts that are done because I just have to get the thoughts out of my head.

  27. Oh, how I get this! 
    And in fact, I’m really hard on myself when the posts don’t come out/make me feel like this. It’s like I think they should all be those deep labors of love – as natural and painful as anything I know.
    Sigh. That’s why I just  want to write about cookies sometimes.

    • HA! I totally get you girl!! If I don’t feel that ‘lovin’ feeling’- I just don’t publish it. Or if I must, I never feel quite right.

      Cookies? Sounds delicious. 🙂

  29. I guess since I don’t write anything “deep” I haven’t experienced this!  I tend to keep my more intense thoughts off the blog.

    • That makes perfect sense Chrysa! I absolutely get that. Thanks for reading this one. As you can maybe tell, I tend to go ‘deep’ over at my blog. 🙂

  30. Perfect! I know exactly what you mean.  Unfortunately, there are many times when I feel the writers breath bubbling to the surface…and I’m in the shower! 
    I LOVE you last line.  Who will receive it?  Oh, that is the $10,000 question.  I just had writers breath earlier tonight about that very thing.  I had to get it out of my head and onto “paper”. Even if my eyes are the only ones who see it, it could no longer stay inside of me. 
    Love

    • Oh how I LOVE that you are right HERE with me, Stephanie!! How many times I have completely lost the idea because I was ‘out’ somewhere (shower included!) and then when I came back to write- it was GONE!! AHHHH! So frustrating!!

      I love that you write it no matter WHO will read it- because that I believe is what confirms your passion for writing. I get that. Me too. 10,000 question!!!!! WHO?

  31. I think the posts that I am most passionate about always include my daughter. For some reason I can always write and write and write about her. Other days I am stumped!

    • Thanks SO much Paige!!!! I know I KNOW!! Those days when you actually have a few HOURS on your hands and the freedom to just GO. Oh, how I relish in that!!

  33. I’ve had that happen a few times with things I’m really passionate about. Then there are times when I just sit there and wonder what am I going to say. 🙂 

    • Yeah- sometimes when I know a post is due or an article needs to be written- I get STUCK because I really need the inspiration to come FIRST! Been there!

  35. It isn’t always like that for me, but often. If I try to force writing (like writing on schedule or because it’s been too long but I don’t really have anything to say) it’s usually disappointing. But if I’m bursting with it, can’t hold it in any longer, then it’s like this. And this “as your spirit lightens” is the result. Such relief when I’ve gotten it on paper (or digital paper anyway).

    You capture so well the tension and delight of having a piece that must be written and breathing it out. I love that metaphor. Thanks for your beautiful post. Glad you’re back.

    • AW, thanks Robin!! I can picture the healing process take place as you write- as I write- it’s incredibly cathartic, isn’t it? I read your words and know they are so genuine and come from deep within- and I love that about you!

  36. This was phenomenal. The way you captured the experience, every moment, and wove it with your words – it was perfect.

  37. You are truly talented. I wish I had that gift. The only time I am that passionate is listening to music. I love music so much that I can close my eyes and be in the song. Thank you for sharing that.

    • Oh I GET that about music Beth!! Oh, how I can immediately be affected by a song… so powerful, isn’t it? Yeah- I get that through my writing too. It’s quite amazing- because instead of it coming from the songwriter, it comes from within me. But then again, I was a songwriter my entire life before I ‘moved’ to writing words only… so there’s that! lol

    • The topic is definitely key to having this kind of passion in writing, ya know? Sometimes we are writing more to share something other than our hearts. There’s value in that too- just not this kind of passion!

  40. You write with so much passion Chris…it’s like you pour your heart and soul into it! For me, it depends on the topic. 🙂

    • You write about such a wide range of topics, that truly makes so much sense Michelle!! I rarely stray from mine- so I get to feel this kind of stuff all the time!! YIPPEE FOR ME!!! LOL 😉

  41. I don’t get the writer’s breath often, but when I do it’s amazing. The problem I have is that I get my best ideas when I am not able to write them down. I compose beautiful sentences in my head and then lose them by them time I get to a computer or paper.

    • I DO THAT ALL THE TIME!!!!!!!!!! Mostly when I am driving or worse yet, lying in bed. OH how I hate that!!!! I am thinking “Just get up and write it down NOW or you will lose it!” And sure enough… the next morning- I got nothin’.

  42. There have been many times that I feel an anxiety or stress that I can’t put my finger on. It’s like something is sitting on my chest, weighing my breath. And then I get to the computer and write … and I realize that I needed to get my thoughts out … I had words pent up inside me that needed to be released. Therapy.

    Lovely post, Chris.

  43. I have had a touch of writer’s breath here and there, but I never would have been able to describe it as eloquently as you have. This post has been an inspiration, for sure! 

    • i KNOW you get this Jen!! i have always needed an ‘outlet’- It was my music- for years. Then I had kids. LOL
      But I somehow found another through just my words… you can’t play the piano in the wee hours with kiddos!! So this works even better for me! New season, new purpose!! I am loving it perhaps even more. 🙂

  45. HA! I can identify with this, but not so much in writing. This is more often the result of something I need to say, and when I start talking, it’s almost impossible to stop me. (Unfortunately for my husband…) But yes, I can identify. Beautifully written, Chris! 

    • Thanks SO much Autumn!! Oh girl- do I KNOW what you are sayin’!! (Sayin’- get it? LOL ) I feel the same way when I have so much to get out of me- and I go and go and ‘breathe’ it out verbally… yes that. 🙂 And CHEERS to our listening hubs!!

  48. Oh yes yes yes. The writer’s breath is so very much my breath. You’ve captured it here so perfectly, Chris!

  49. I can relate to this passionate post. I don’t feel that passion every time I write, but I do most of the time; especially when I have an exciting project to work on… Loved this. 🙂

    • The key word I read in your comment is ‘flows’- you’re doing something right Cassie! Maybe you just haven’t hit that ‘sweet spot’ of writing because what you write about isn’t a passionate topic. It surely doesn’t make you any less of a writer.

  52. Nailed it! So grateful that you are out there writing and feeling and pouring it all out to us. You never cease to amaze me at your ability to reach people. XO

    • AW!!! Do you know how much I LOVE YOUR PRECIOUS SUPPORT??? Oh AnnMarie- I can’t tell you how much it means to me… YOU – oh how I appreciate YOU. XOXOXO…..

  53. I have writer’s breath sometimes.  An idea comes and I just can’t get it typed up quick enough.  Other times, the stress of blogging and life seems to steal my writer’s breath and knock the wind right out of me of a while.  

    • Yeah- I get that Lisa… when it’s pushed and pressured and forced air. It’s more a task at hand, than a beautiful breath. It’s so hard to pull back and ‘breathe’ in fresh air and so we don’t have to ‘gasp’ it out with labor and tension. Deadlines do that to me.

  54. I think this is why I started writing because I felt this outlet was here and I needed to embrace it. Speaking the words even to a good friend is not the same, by writing I can focus on the precise thought and express exactly what needs to be said. I loved reading this, as I do all of your posts (even if I don’t always get to comment!) – because well, is there a “reader’s breath?” I had that with this post.