In the spirit of summer, I’m revisiting some old favorite guest posts that I think you’ll enjoy. This one is from about 5 year ago, written by Rebecca of Unexplained x2.
If you know me, you know there’s not a lot that I “can’t” say…it pretty much all comes out of my mouth whether you want it or not.
So, here are the things I love to say:
- Ladies, when you leave the house, please put on some damn makeup. If you don’t, it’s like you’ve given up. Give a little effort…for the rest of us, please! After all, we’re the ones who have to look at you!
- Take a leap of faith and buy a decent bra. Your poor little puppies shouldn’t be so far down that you need to move them out of your way to properly fasten your seat belt. I am still shocked that after Oprah’s bra revolution that we’re still having these conversations! Hoist them up…after all, if your boobs look bigger, your tummy will look smaller!
- If you’ve worn it to bed, don’t wear it out of the house…jammies are not proper attire for anywhere but your own house…certainly not the grocery store!
- Don’t complain about what you look like in pictures…in 10 years you’ll want this version of yourself back.
- Try really hard not to compare yourself to everyone else…most people lie anyway.
- Infertility sucks. So try really hard not to ask people you barely know when they’re having kids, that it’s time to start trying for a second, or tell them when/how to have sex (every other night so I’ve been told a like zillion times)…chances are they’re already on it (so to speak) and don’t feel like discussing it with you. Either that or you may have just sent them to the car in hysterics because they had just gotten their period that morning. It’s none of your business.
- That being said, please don’t call your children miracles…it’s a mistake and will not serve them well down the road when they figure out that they’re not actually miraculous, but human like the rest of us.
- Smile at each other. I feel that women avoid eye contact with each other and I don’t understand this phenomenon. Why do we hate each other?
- When you start to feel jealous of someone, take a moment to realize that someone else is jealous of your life. It puts it all into perspective.
- If all else fails, remember, again, that most people lie anyway.
- Do something nice for yourself…you deserve it.
- Do something nice for your husband…chances are, he deserves it.
- Your kids will get nice stuff for the rest of their life…ignore them while you’re doting on yourself!
- Enjoy your life…it’s the only one you’ve got!