I must admit that I was a bit of an obnoxious birthday party grinch back when my oldest was about to turn one.
I knew other people had huge first birthday party blowouts, but I wanted nothing to do with anything like that.
I called it silly to spend all that money and to have such a huge party when the 1 year-old won’t remember it and will probably be miserable during it.
Monkey would have been miserable anyway. When he was one, he did not particularly care for people. A big crowd would have freaked him out.
So, I was a bit smug and annoying with my views on birthdays.
For his second birthday, he did have one friend there in addition to family. They ran around the house and had themselves a good time.
I did think about having a big party at that time, but Hubs had just lost his job and we were living in a small place, so it was more of a matter of being practical at that point.
Then came Bear’s first birthday.
He loved people, so we had a bigger party for him. I think there were something like 18 kids running around our house at the time(we’d moved by that point, too).
Okay, so I guess I get why people celebrate like that. Nothing wrong with it.
Birthdays since then: 2 at a kids’ gym, 1 at build-a-bear(sounds crazy, but it was actually the easiest AND cheapest birthday party we’ve ever had, at least counting the ones where the kids had more than 1 friend there), and 1 party at home where we had the gym-bus come to us, all with around 15-20 kiddos there.
The boys have had a blast at their parties.
They start planning early for them, with where they want their party, who they want to be there, and what kind of cake they will have.
I don’t feel like it’s crazy to have big parties for them when they are so little.
It’s more than a little embarrassing when I think about just how outspoken I was on how wrong I thought it was to have birthday parties like this.
I actually feel super guilty right now because Monkey had been planning his fifth birthday party for seven months now. He knew where he would have it(one of those bounce places) and all the other details.
And I was okay with that because it’s his fifth, a big deal.
But, we moved a month and a half before his birthday.
And he only started preschool two weeks ago.
So, trying to plan a big shebang for him was hard.
We just had a family party…
But, I’m still considering letting him have a belated birthday party in January and invite his friends from preschool to that.
It’s ironic how I can go from a being the birthday party grinch to someone who feels guilty for not having one.
I think having a belated birthday party for him is a great idea. I bet he was so disappointed!
And don't be to hard on yourself. As parents we do the best we can and when we know better we do better.
I go through this every year too. I agree with Foursons, we can only do our best as parents and not be so hard on ourselves. My favorite memories of birthday parties were of simple parties with my cousins.
HI! I'm with you on that one! I, too have changed about parties!!
I have always given my kids big parties. My mom did that for us. We didn't get a lot during the year so she made sure on birthdays we did it up big.
This made me smile. I've done an about face on SO many things since kids and especially since more than one kid! Love it. We do family parties on their actual birthday and have one huge picnic for all of them every summer. So far it's worked, but I have a feeling as they get older they will refuse to share.
I figure we'll end up doing about 4 big parties for each of the boys. Their 1 year, 5 year (Maybe 6 for Buster because he has a late b-day and won't be in Kindergarten until he's 6), and then one or two as they get old. Maybe one in middle school and one in high school.
I agree with Julie. Don't feel bad.
Sometimes we do big parties but other times we go somewhere special for the birthday boy. They are old enough that we let them choose.
Last year both decided not to have parties and we had a huge end-of-the-school-year party in the backyard with a 5-in-1 inflatable and a snow cone machine.
I do the same! ELijah had a great idea this year to invite all his friends to the Smithsonian for his birthday. Except we live in MN. Nixed that quickly.
I'm not a big birthday party person. My oldest's birthday is Jan 1st. So he ends up having his birthday later when friends can be around.
My dad had a heart attack the day before one child's birthday and didn't become conscious until after the second child's birthday this spring. They were such troopers to willingly give up their parties.
Lol I wouldn't call myself a birthday party grinch, but like you just read in my blog we don't do big birthday parties in my family. Who knows, I might change my mind when they start school and have more friends… For now at almost 1 and almost 3 we're keeping it simple. ๐
To each their own.
Thanks for stopping by my blog! ๐
I think the first bday is more for the parents (mom) than anyone else…the babe's first will probably be spent on the water (since she is a July babe).
~WM