If I’m not at home, I most likely have my iPhone or my iPad or both with me.
And I’ll use them to check email and respond if need be. Same goes for facebook and twitter.
Most of what I’m doing is for work.
But I’ll admit that sometimes, I’ll scroll through instagram just for fun or check my personal facebook to see what friends from home are up to. Or maybe even check a blog or two.
You could judge me as being one of those moms who always has her nose in her phone and is ignoring her kids.
But if that’s all you see, you aren’t looking close enough.
Being a wahm means that my work is portable and that sometimes means on the sidelines at a soccer or basketball practice. It’s how I am able to be at every practice, game, and event my boys have. Something I wouldn’t always be able to manage if I had a different kind of job.
Isn’t it better that I’m there but sometimes have to be online?
And what about the moms who spend an entire practice gossiping and never once look out on the field to see what their kids are doing? But because they aren’t using technology, they are more connected to what is going on? I don’t think so.
Even if a mom uses a few minutes of practice to do something for herself online, something that has nothing to do with work, I don’t see anything wrong with that, either.
It’s not really all that different than the mom who is sitting by herself, seemingly watching practice, but letting her mind wander to her grocery list or to fantasizing about wishing she were on a tropical island somewhere.
I know that the sight of moms with their phones seemingly permanently attached to them at all times is a newer phenomenon. And one that I often see criticism of: those moms aren’t paying attention to their kids. It’s said that they need to learn to disconnect and just be in the moment.
But, you never know what that mom is actually doing on her phone. Maybe she is working. Maybe she’s checking for a facebook update about a sick family member. Or maybe it’s just been a really long day and this is the second hour in a row she’s been sitting on the soccer field and she just needs a minute or two to herself. Or maybe she’s ignoring the gossipers around her by reading with her Kindle app.
Whatever it is that she’s doing, let her be. Let me be.
I’m not going to apologize for the time I spend on my phone. Even if there is someone who thinks I shouldn’t be. They don’t know my circumstances and they are only catching a glimpse of my life: they don’t see the times when my family does spend quality(and technology-free) time together.
Just like everything else we do as moms, there has to be a balance. And while I’ve figured out that I’ll never be able to find a perfect balance in my life, I can still find a pretty damn good one.
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