What can I tell you about this week’s Blog Friend Feature? Well, she is one busy lady! First of all, she is part of the Nerd Mafia and hosts a weekly meme, called Word Up, Yo. Which I love because I’m such a nerd at heart.
She also is the creator of Blog Boycott Day. Even though I am far too blog-addicted to really participate, it’s a fun day to hang out on twitter.
Do you know who I am talking about? If you haven’t met Liz from a belle, a bean & a chicago dog, then you are in for a treat!
Shell has kept us captivated for weeks with an amazing story of love, full of twists and turns, and ups and downs. I’ve been married for 9 years, and while I have my own love story, it isn’t nearly as engaging nor as exciting as Shell’s.
Shell’s series got me thinking, though, about the guys I dated *before* I met Mr. Right, and how they each taught me something important about life and love.
There are a couple things you should know about me before I go any further.
1. I don’t have a “type” when it comes to guys. If you were to line up the guys I’ve dated, they’d run the gamut, and you’d fail to see any common thread connecting them.
2. My mom used to joke that until a guy was around for at least 3 months, she didn’t pay any attention. And she’s right; that really was a turning point of sorts. I guess that I’m of the mindset that you get to know one another pretty quickly at the beginning of a dating relationship, and any obvious major differences or incompatibilities that become apparent during that time just means that you two aren’t meant to be together, and you should end things and move on.
I was someone who met Mr. Right in college and was engaged before graduation, so no “Sex And The City”-worthy dating tales from me. Just regular guys from the time of my life when papers, final exams, proms and date parties were the norm.
My top 3 most influential boyfriends would probably be R, W and B. R and I dated on and off in high school (and would hook-up for random make-out sessions when we were both home from college!). He and I had a strong physical chemistry, but the one thing that drove me absolutely insane about him was his tendency to be a wuss. I have a strong head on my shoulders, and God help me – I need a guy who isn’t afraid to wear the pants – even just capris! – and have an opinion!! I suppose if I had a need for control, he would have been perfect, but that’s just not me; I need a partner. It isn’t attractive to feel like the mother in a relationship, ya know?
W is the guy who made me crazy in the head. His personality was so different than any other guy I dated, and didn’t exactly make me any kind of priority in his life, but – man – was I head over heels! The girls in my sorority would tell me he was no good for me and that I deserved someone so much better, and they were right. But at the same time he gave me the gift of learning to take a step back and not always take life so seriously. He was so lazy when it came to college and, well, most anything, but he gave me a totally different perspective on not sweating the small stuff so much. I think he had a pretty big impact on the person I became.
B is the guy who helped me to get over W. He is also the last guy I dated before meeting Mr. Right. B was so right for me at the time; I really needed a good, sweet guy in my life, and I think I thought I had stronger feelings for him than I actually did. He was totally the Rebound Guy, but helped my heart to get ready for falling in love forever.
Some interesting notes about these 3 guys. First, I still talk to 2 of them, and those two also told me at some point since the end of our relationships but before I got married, that they totally imagined marrying me one day. Second, my sorority pledge mom used to be the biggest advocate against dating W, but she didn’t seem to mind when I hooked them up my senior year of college (both of them had already graduated). W and my pledge mom just welcomed Baby #2 into their family about 3 weeks ago.
So what about you? Do you look at your past relationships as “regrets”? Or do you think they provided something positive to your life? Do you still speak with any of your former boyfriends?