Things I Can't Say

Tips and Tales from an Introverted Mom

Blog Friend Feature: Boobies, Babies, and a Blog

I found this week’s Blog Friend Feature last spring, when someone directed me to her blog on twitter. I can’t remember who it was, but I remember reading that post of hers and wanting to go back to the days when it was cool to high-five someone(okay, I still do that) and high five her. Because she spoke her mind, openly and honestly.

Jana, or Boobies as she is more commonly know, blogs at Boobies, Babies, and a Blog. She is hysterically funny and is someone who will have your back.  Oh, and she didn’t mind my million detailed questions about getting a “mommy makeover.” We went right into the girl talk.  She not only is a great friend to have, but she also has fabulous giveaways on her blog, too.

Hi everyone! For those who haven’t had the opportunity to meet me, I’m Boobies. Stay at home SUPERmom of three, wifey, shoe connoisseur, & all around big mouth. When Shell asked me to be her BFF, I was overjoyed. (Because come on…Shell’s like the Oprah of the blog world, am I right?)

So after much pondering on what I would write about-I decided to stick with a topic I am an expert at. But then I had to try to think of all the things I’m all knowing in regards to. My short only list came out looking like this:

  • Parenting (My own left of center techniques, but still yet.)
  • Shoes
  • Fake Breasts
  • Spending Mr. Boobie’s $ & blinding him with my sex appeal when the bills come rolling in.

So Parenting wins out. (Because the truth is, it always does!) I have three kids; ages 4 to 14. I know..it’s kind of  ridonkulous a spread. In fairness to myself-I’m a pretty kick ass Mom. Clearly, I’m not perfect..but we love each other, laugh together, no one has ever ended up in juvie, jail, or rehab…so I think we’re holding it down pretty well.

I’m not a strict Mom in most aspects of parenting; but there are a few essentials that I’ve made it a point to pass on to my kids.

HONESTY- A must for a parent-child relationship. I’ve drilled it into all three of their heads from the time they could talk.

Shining example:

Teenie Queenie (That’s my 14 year old daughter) was texting the other night. Because, you know-teenagers don’t know how to do anything else. So I asked her who it was that she was texting with, what they were talking about, all that nosey shit a Mom SHOULD do. She tells me who it is. It’s a boy. (Naturally.) This particular boy has quite the rep. He’s trying to break Wilt Chamberlain’s record–if you know what I’m saying. (Okay…maybe somewhere between Tiger & Gene would be more appropriate to say.)

 
  http://giagantor.com/

Anymaleteentramp, the word around the water fountain is–this kid has herpes. Like visually confirmed. In any event, I tell my daughter not to be rude to him or say anything about it..but in not so many words–okay, I explicitly advised her to never date/kiss/share beverages/or star on Teen Mom with this young man. (Hey, you can’t ever be too safe.) So on to the great virtue of honesty. She tells me this kid wants to go out with her. Eeeek! “What’d you say?” I ask T.Q. Knowing she said something really brilliant like; “I think we’re so much better off as friends.” She looked up from her phone and very honestly said–“I told him you didn’t want me dating him because you think he has herpes.” HONESTY.

FIND YOUR VOICE & ALWAYS LET IT BE HEARD- I never want my kids to take a back seat to anyone. I don’t want my boy’s to marry a Kate Gosselin and live as a doormat for years, then go through a midlife Ed Hardy induced fog complete with hair plugs and teenage lovers. I want them to find their voice and never be afraid to use it. So I’ve always tried to instill a confidence in them to do so.

Shining example:

A couple days ago, I was grocery shopping with The Boss. (That’s my 4 year old son.) We passed a Dad and his son who looked to be about the same age. In passing, the boy yelled to my son; “Hey little boy. Look what I got.” He was holding up a toy. I’m thinking great…now The Boss will insist he needs that toy and mass chaos is gonna ensue for sure. The Boss waits until we are at opposite ends of the aisle…and apparantly he heard his inner voice. Because he screamed this: “Hey kid! I’m not a boy. I’m a grown man!” All eyes on us. FIND YOUR VOICE & ALWAYS LET IT BE HEARD.

Lastly….BE SPIRITUAL. I don’t care if my kids believe in God, Buddha, Chuck Norris…I just want them to sense a higher power that they can lean on in hard times.

Shining example:

A while back T.Q. & Middle Man (That would be my 13 year old son.) were having a conversation about The Bible. My daughter was inquiring about who actually WROTE the great book. That’s when Middle Man smirked at her and said; “Everyone knows Albert Einstein wrote the bible.” (And he really meant it.) BE SPIRITUAL.

Thank you everyone who hung with me and smooches to Shell. I’ll be your BFF any day! XO-Boobies

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Don’t you just love her honesty in parenting? Please leave Jana some comment love here and then go follow her blog!

Comments

  2. Herpes @14 seriously?? I have always told my boys to protect themselves before they get something Ajax won't scrub off. Sounds like someone's momma failed to teach that.
    BWHAHAHA @the grown man..
    Already a boobies chaser.. have been for a while now.. all the cool kids are doing it.

  4. What a riot! LOVE your sense of humor. My oldest is almost 12. (My youngest is 3, so I can relate to your situation). I HOPE I still have my sense of humor when he's 14. It's slowly fading away! 😉

    Mich

  6. I just read the herpes snippet to the hubs and I think we're going to lock our 11 month old daughter in the house until she's 30. EEK is right!

  7. That Middle Man is going to win the
    Nobel Peace Prize one of these days. I just know it.

    I love the honesty and speaking their minds. I'm still LOLing over the "man" comment. That's hilarious!

    I love Boobies!!

  11. I love my Boobies. When I grow up, I wanna be just like her.

    Herpes at 14? Ewww! I hope she doesn't cave in to his good looks and end up on 16 and Pregnant. I HATE that show.

    Thanks for featuring her as your BFF!

  12. I lurk over at the Boobies blog already. I find her fabulously funny.

    We parent about the same! It's a comfort to know that it's not just me! 😛

  13. Holy shit, anyone that goes by Boobies is my kinda gal. I'll be there soon. To let my voice be heard 😉

  15. I must go and read her blog. She's hilarious and she is mom with a 13 year old teenage male like me.

    Love her name….it is my mom's name.

  19. <3 I love you all!!!

    So happy to have picked up some fab Boobie Chasers and found some amazing new blogs too!

    Thanks Shell!! BFF!

  22. SO Jana, I think I just pissed my pants three times. THanks for that. You know I have stress incontinence from birthing these 2 giant domed beauties. Guess I'll go change my panties. Now, don;t you go making me piss myself again anytime soon:)LOL

  23. Teenage boys are the main reason I was soooo glad we had a boy — does that make sense? If I had a girl, I'd be terrified of boys taking advantage of her. Of course, now I'm worried about a silly teenage girl hurting my baby boy so…………..

    I'm new around here…glad to find TWO new blogs to read 🙂

  24. Lol! Okay she is hilarious! And yes using our sexuality to make our husbands to forget about how much money we spend, how messy the house is, etc is not only necessary but encouraged!

  26. Haha honesty is great. Poor herpes boy though. 14 is pretty young to have that already.
    I really love this post.

  27. Oh I am rolling here… this is fabulous, she is fabulous… I can't believe this is the first I've heard! Off to follow now!

  28. I'm dying about the herpes! Not that he has it, of course, but it totally sounds like something my youngest daughter would do.

  33. I think I like worrying about which kid drew in crayon on my wall. Please let them stay young forever! I am not ready to deal with herpes infested teens.

    Loved the post!

  34. What a great choice for BFF!!

    I can't believe that kids have herpes at 14.

    What a great post. I also love that she uses her sexuality to mask the damage of the credit card bills. Hilarious!

    Off to follow her now 🙂

  37. OMG, Boobies! Loved you post here and your honest parenting advice. You are one great and funny Mama! Sounds like you've got great kids too!

  40. I don't think I can bring myself to say Boo … (gulp) … ies. It sounds you're doing a model job parenting and I love that TQ told the dude where it stood.