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Things I Can't Say

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A Few Things I Can’t Say

things they can't sayElaine Alguire is the multi-tasker behind The Miss Elaine-ous Life. When not wrangling children she’s taking photographs (and posting many to Instagram!), writing or out running (both literally and figuratively). You can also find her updating her blog FB page or tweeting @elainea.
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There are some things I feel I can’t say at times.  Does this happen to you?
Such as…
“Daddy, you really need to trim those eyebrows”.
Oh, who am I kidding, I have said this to him.  And I have trimmed them for him.  Now THAT is daughterly love.

or

”Son, you look like a real dork with your socks pulled up like that.”
Okay, fine, I’ve said that too.  (please don’t hate on me, we totally laughed after)

And there are some REAL road ragey things I’d LIKE to say while driving in my MomVan loaded with kids but I REALLY can’t do that so I end up using lame and tame works like “jerk” and “punk”.

And then I hear from the background in a little kid voice, “JERK!!”

Yeah. SO I am glad I did not say that other four-letter word. Yay me!!
I also cannot say the word “fanny” without totally cracking up because my Welsh friend Deborah told me the actual, real meaning where she’s from and ever since then well…. yeah, cue school boy-type giggles.

Plus, I can’t say, “Mr. J (guy who does our lawn), you don’t do a very good job sometimes.  Like you leave patches of grass un-mowed and do not weed eat some of the weeds.”

But I won’t say that because I am conflict adverse with people I do not know that well.   And well, I don’t have to mow the lawn so…

I also can’t say “No” to the little boy who comes to my bed in the middle of the night and says “Mom, can I snuggle?” I mean, how could I?

And I usually can’t say “no” to dessert either.  Just FYI.

I can’t say that I think the 19-year-ish old lifeguard at the pool is really hot because that would be inappropriate and I would be called a “cougar”.  But I guess I’ve been called worse… So, lemme tell you about this lifeguard…

I also cannot say to my neighbor, “Really, that is none of your business” because even if I did she would still think it is because well, she thinks everything is her business.  And then things would be awkward between us and I really don’t like awkward.  Plus, who would get my mail while I was on vacation?

I can’t say that some days I am so tired from doing ALLTHETHINGS that a mother does because then I would sound like I am complaining and I SO am not. (but some days, I’m tired, y’all).

I also can’t say that I would trade that type of tired for anything else because I SO would not. EVER.

So, there are some things I can’t say.

What can’t you say?

p.s. I CAN say that I thought it was pretty cool that I got to use contractions throughout this post and not feel like I was being grammatically incorrect.  That was pretty awesome.

The Miss Elaine-ous Life

Comments

  1. Fanny!! 🙂
    I say stuff like, “there’s a hair coming out of your ear” to my husband, so nothing’s off limits really. Heh.

    • My hubby usually has hairs coming out of his nose.  And yeah, I totally tell him about those while laughing really hard! 😉 

      FANNY!! 

  2. Yes, yes, and yes!  I can’t  say no to snuggling or dessert or to ogling that 19 year old lifeguard, even though I could be his mother.  And I don’t say “jerk” behind the wheel of my car but I use the word “tool.” Elaine,  we have to hang out more for sure.  

    • Oooh, TOOL is a totally good one too.  I need to use that one instead!  Thanks for the idea.  And let’s go for coffee soon… 😉  #IWish

  3. I can’t say no to snuggles and dessert either. And in the car, I try to avoid talking to other motorists, but occasionally will say, “What are you doing?” when I see a perplexing/frustrating situation – which always sparks a lot of interest from the back seat.  

    • See I wouldn’t just SAY “What are you doing?”  I would be all “WHAT THE BLEEPITY BLEEP, BLEEP ARE YOU DOING!?!?”  So… yeah… 😉 

      And dessert, it’s just SO good!

  5. I can’t say things like, “Your child is a pain in the butt who will never amount to anything and the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree!” Even though sometimes I would really, really like to!

  6. I can’t say no to my 3-year-old at all. I can’t say to a certain relative, “You are driving me freaking crazy with your unreasonable demands and suffocating ways.”

  7. There are many things I can’t say on the internet, but in real life? Almost nothing is off limits. Just like the other day when everyone was in the kitchen when I was trying to make dinner and I said, “EVERYONE WITH A PENIS NEEDS TO GET OUT OF THIS KITCHEN RIGHT NOW!”

    What?

  10. Oh the neighbors…they will drive you bonkers…but you don’t ever want to tick them off…but don’t you just want to tell them to buzz off?

  11. Ha! You crack me up. I totally can’t say how yicky it feels to be pregnant- so soon after publicly announcing it. (Peeps just don’t understand the “morning” sickness.)

  13. Well all I can say is how beautifully innocent this post really truly is!!! Did you know that my kiddos nicknames are “pain” and “high maintenance”?? Like seriously. I will tell my hubs some of the GODAWFUL things EVER. Oh, and my kiddos too. I notice as they get older, I am becoming more ‘liberal’ with my tongue…
    And that is soooooo not a good thing! Geez…

    Such a fun post here Elaine!!! SO glad to get to know you better!! I can’t say no to sooooo many things my kids ask of me. Cause I love ’em like that… and ps: I still let my kids come to my bed and sleep with me any darn night they want to. They are 2nd and 5th graders now… I don’t see that ever changing over here. And oh, how I still love every minute of it!! 😉

  14. Thanks, Chris!  And yes, really hard not to let the kiddos in the bed.  We just know that someday they will be gone and these days are short… 

    xo

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